You approached me, armed with a homerun swagger
and a pick-up line from somewhere out in left field.
It was probably a bad call on your part
to swing for the fences on your first at bat.
Your locker room humor was a swing and a miss.
Venturing into foul territory put you in a pickle,
but you managed to keep your eye on the ball,
even though your game had taken a bad bounce.
I was almost tempted to take it into extra innings
when you threw me a curve with those bedroom eyes,
until you made the fatal error of trying to steal first base...
But don't worry, you can rethink your strategy
While you're riding the bench.
Author notes
TabbyJoy
A contest entry
- Game Metaphors by Metaphorist.
600 points, ended May 12, 2008, 8 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - so..how about the bronze winners now? by Cat10.
600 points, ended June 2, 2008, 31 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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thank you for entering! this poem is great! I love the metaphor! it took me awhile, but I got it 100% during the last stanza! great job and good luck!
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Wow! For one of your first cracks (pun intended) at extended metaphor, I'd say you were very successful! It's definitely a style I think you can master if you wanted to. Well done. Thanks for entering!
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i LOVE this one! i am a big baseball fan and the terminoology with the metaphorical meaning is GREAT! i hope this does well for you in the contest.
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this is really good i love bball and as u may know i play softball good luck in the contest sissy
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Nice one!!
Commparing baseball and men and their pick-up lines!
Good-luck in the contest!
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Ooohhhh very clever. I like all the relationship references done in a very tasteful way and also using my favorite sport's lingo...baseball! This is really fantastic. It's very cute. I hope you win...you deserve to! Good luck in your contest!
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