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My Disease

I’m living in the shambles of my little wreck
Held together solely by the grips of death.
Threw my cares against the wall,
Within the disease, I took a fall.

Looked for righteousness in all my actions
Searched for perfection, even if I took life in tokens and fractions
With the gift of disease, stolen was respect
But with the gift of recovery, I’ve discovered intellect.

She held me for at least two years,
Stole my smile, only gave me fears
Took life away breath by breath,
Almost churned an early death.

To prove them wrong, the way it began
But I never could see how deep my ailment ran.
Twice broken heart, and hidden tears,
She hid amongst, promising to end the fears.

She promised to give me beauty, but she also gave me pain,
Bringing along lies, cursing my morals to shame.
I’ve cheated my way through life’s sorts of games
Only to see, that I was on the wrong play.

Never knew I’d let her take over,
And let her steal my love from others,
Gave away all my thoughts,
And against my loves, a war was fought.

Now I fight her day by day,
Easing my disease, to go away.
I see myself in a new light,
Fresh and open to a healthier life.

Author notes

i WAS bulimic, for like 2 years,
this is what its done to me..

A contest entry

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Comments


  • HeartbreakHeroine-x gold member
    May 13

    Edit | Reply
    This is a great piece! Loved your word usage, a few phrases in particular. "Within the disease" I absolutely loved that phrase. It's so true; you are...trapped...kind of inside the "disease," looking out but unable to do anything but be completely ensnared by it. Loved the message here. My only suggestion is that the rhyme/flow of the piece sometimes seems a bit off, especially in the second stanza. You might want to check that, maybe read the piece aloud as if you were someone who had never seen it before and just let the rhythm come out as it will and listen for awkward parts. That's the only thing though. Overall, very well done, thanks for your entry and good luck...

    ~QoA

  • ZeInkslinger Of God
    May 8

    Edit | Reply
    a good message and beautiful piece!
    wonderfully penned, lovely metaphors!
    you might want to check on your rhyming scheme but other than that, it's a well-penned reponse and
    '3 thumbs up' poem!