Confusion

Confused...
Don't know what to do...
Should I give the guy another chance?
Or should I walk away before I get in too deep?
How should I decide?
It's such a hard call to make.
To love or not to love...
Is pain worth it?
What if this is serious?
Lost...
Can't speak...
I've never felt this scared before.
I've never felt the need to run away
From something that could be good.
I can run from the bad things,
But is this bad enough to turn away?
How can I describe this?
It's a stabwound in my chest,
An injection of some deadly toxin
When it should be valium.
It's a surgery without anastheasia.
If feels like a hole...
A void...
Growing larger...
Swallowing everything...
Cutting deeper into my heart...
My soul...
My life...
Is it possible to feel this way?
Is it really this painful?
When you can't give an answer...
Don't know what to do...
Confused...
When you can't speak...
Lost...
How can I fill the hole,
Wake up from this torturous coma,
Find the antidote,
Or heal the gaping wound
That I've hidden for so long?
Make this pain go away
And turn it into wings
So I can fly away.
Give me the strength to tell the truth,
The whole truth,
Nothing but the truth.
To love or not to love...
One of the biggest decisions in life...
What will I choose?