You said you'd never hurt me
and I know you've tried your best
All you did was say hello
My imagination did the rest
Proportion kinda slipped aside
I blew it out the door
I heard the things I wanted to
you said nothing more.
Seems that I'm a magnet
when it comes to pain
baby to repeat myself
I'd do it all again.
Apparitions in my mind
causing such confusion
You said you'd never hurt me
pain's just an illusion.
I walked right into the door
you don't need to remind me
Bruising my own heart again
when I closed the door behind me
You said you'd never hurt me
and I know you've done your best
All you did was say hello
my imagination did the rest.
Author notes
The lines: baby to repeat myself I'd do it all again need lots of work. i welcome suggestions.
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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Wow that was just amazing and very well written!
Congratulations on the creation of such a beautiful piece of poetry -
Beautiful
Very well written...as all of your work is...Once again,i can relate to this completely. I love how you say you are a magnet for pain. Thats me,too. Beautiful work.
-Selithia
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Oh wow, I'm speechless to this piece of yours. I can relate to it very much of my past. I did the who overboard imagination part myself, learned real quick to control that and not suffer anymore pain from it. This was fantastic! you did an excellent job writing this piee. I liked it very much, keep up the awesome work.
~~Tori~~
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thank you very much for the read and generous comment.
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Full of emotion and sadness, well written
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Beautiful! Simply beautiful! The imagery and metaphor were amazingly done, and the flow was very flowy! It was very enjoyable to read! Excellent job!!!
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I love this! It's beautiful!
I think everyone feels this way sometimes. Hurt, or forgotten, or even betrayed.
-Claps- I love it. <3 -
Interesting
A find it amazing how we can take a nice word ot two and tirn it into a dream. It has happen to me at times and your explain it so well. And the rhyme is delicious. Happy Moms day
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I walked right into the door
you don't need to remind me
Bruising my own heart again
when I closed the door behind me
You said you'd never hurt me
and I know you've done your best
All you did was say hello
my imagination did the rest.
great poem full of emotions of sadness from the pains of a broken heart.
Thank you for sharing your poem with the group.
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Good rhythm rhyme, flow in these lines of the poem. Easy to read and understand what you are sharing here.
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Oh my. This is amazing!!!! I love the rhyme, it was so contisten and the words were very effective. I absoloutly love it.
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Excellent as always. How can one compete.
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thank you very much. I've not been doing much writing lately and last night it came to me in fits and starts. Anyway, thank you for the generous comment.
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I like this poem. Just so i get this right SHE was the reason for the relationship going to hell? Awesome. Great job.
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Its just a poem... no real relationship. The idea is of someone that just kind of jumps to conclusions and makes a relationship out of nothing ... taking for granted that there's something there when there isn't.
Thanks for reading and commenting btw
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