Tides shifted,
a drought fell
upon emotions.
Alabama found comfort
in Absolute and Canada.
Feeling of loss
cracked the red clay,
running South
and the rains came down
as Georgia slipped away.
In a list
A contest entry
- Have you ever... by Age of Rain.
1300 points, ended July 31, 2008, 57 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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Very sad and very pretty. Thank you for entering the contest, good luck.
♥
whisper
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This has a strong rhythm to it. Good work.
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So this is amazing. Brevity and power all in one. You delivered a lightning blow to my imagination. Thank you for entering this. Best of Luck!
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Love it. Powerful imagery. Sparse, beautiful lines. Well done.
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oh my gosh
This poem is truly great. i like how its so short and pushes forward so many ideas and feelings in 2 stanzas. i like both stanzas a lot! well done, great work
thanks,
-Michaella- -
GOTCHA!
Your metaphors in the first stanza, superb! ONce upon a time, in a long ago land, PIttsburgh drowned itself in Absolute. Alas, that wasn't the answer! Your verse is cleverly written as cities keep running away from themselves! "Wherever you go, there you are" Found that out the hard way. You write so keen.
Sis XOXO
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Lovely the imagery here, really intense and rather abstract.
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This is such a wonderful poem. The first stanza is awesome but the second one really captured my attention.
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Beautifully written. Thanks for sharing such an image invoking piece!
Spreadint the love,
Miley
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Interesting piece, things are always changing. It is inevitable. Thank you for sharing your poem and the best of luck to you.
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Speaks volumes in so few words. Great images and well crafted phrasing. Very nice.
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Perfectly written with great metaphors surounding great meaning. Touch and heartfelt...another wonderous piece.
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WoW this is so very touching and sad.
Grabs at ones heart.
You have done an excellent job in writing this piece.
I don't think anyone could have written this with more emotions, then you have.
I am sending prays...
loveandblessings2u & yours always
Joyce
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this had such a deep sadness to it...
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Wow... the tides of emotion that can shift on us and sweep us away!
Hope you're ok sis!
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Superbly written sweety, a sad feel permeates this. Time shifts thoughts and finds distances intruding, yet bonds are made that last and can bear being stretched. For they are true and will not be set aside.
Love you,
Sun and stars shine no brighter than you!
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wow, all I can think of platonik shifts within the land.
great metaphor and imagery here
keep writing
Tamara
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I dont know what to say but had to leave the applause this deserves.
love fire
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OOoooooooh
well i really dont know what to put here,
glad im in the uk i guess,
mom i hope the pain eases, this is too painful to witness
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Excellent
Beautiful write. I can see the clay washing away during a rain storm.
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