Tribal object of the ancestral spirit,
opens the mind to knowledge, with brio.
Totem made from the animal and plant,
envelopes the tribe with traditions from past age.
Memories of old, sung around the fires with acclaim.
Immersed in legend of a common fasti,
steeped in ancient history representing many tribes.
Must always be honored as the family's emblem.
Author notes
I went with belief. This was tough!!
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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84.75
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Kept to Form: 10
Grammar/Spelling: 15/20
the spelling was fine but the punctuation and capitalization were off.
Useful/appropriate use of line breaks (were line breaks in the right place/did they help with the poem?): 10/10
Vocabulary: 7/10
correct but not imaginative
Correct use of literary devices (did metaphors/similies make sense etc): 8/10
Flow & Readability (did the piece make sense?): 17/20
Appealing (was the piece enjoyable): 7/10
Personal Opinion: 7/10
Total: 81/100
was unique and different well done
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Kept to Form: 10
Grammar/Spelling: 17/20
Useful/appropriate use of line breaks: 8/10
Vocabulary: 8/10
Correct use of literary devices: 8/10
Flow & Readability: 17/20
Appealing : 7/10
Personal Opinion: 7/10
Total: 82/100
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Kept to Form: 10
Grammar/Spelling: 17/20
The spelling was fine, but I removed points because the line beginning with "Cocooned" is really a lengthy phrase rather than a sentence.
Useful/appropriate use of line breaks (were line breaks in the right place/did they help with the poem?): 10/10
Vocabulary: 9/10
Correct use of literary devices (did metaphors/similies make sense etc): 8/10
Flow & Readability (did the piece make sense?): 17/20
Appealing (was the piece enjoyable): 8/10
Personal Opinion: 8/10
Total: 87/100
I like the word, it's very unique! -
Congratulations on completing a difficult form.
Kept to Form: 10
Grammar/Spelling: 17/20
the spelling was fine but the punctuation was a little off.
Useful/appropriate use of line breaks (were line breaks in the right place/did they help with the poem?): 10/10
Vocabulary: 9/10
Correct use of literary devices (did metaphors/similies make sense etc): 8/10
Flow & Readability (did the piece make sense?): 18/20
Appealing (was the piece enjoyable): 9/10
Personal Opinion: 8/10
Total: 89/100
An interesting choice of topic and a nicely written poem. -
Oh nice. A cryptic and ancient feel that somehow makes me feel nostalgic. You managed a rich depth in this piece I would not have thought possible for such a horrid form. (Shadow Acrostics are not fun, in my opinion *laughs*)
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I totally agree! Do not like this form at all. Thank you for your kind words,Greenhrt, they are appreciated very much.
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The contest gave you a complex task! Your definition fills the bill, and offers insight with its images of tribal customs. Best of luck!
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