You lay there on your belly
Spitting sand and bile
Grease drips from your lips
Your eyes melt
They leak away
Glaciers
in the
midday sun
You lay there on your back
Sweating ink and glue
Poetry bleeds from your hands
Your hairs rot
They blow away
Needles
in the
autumn cold
But it means nothing to me
To see you like that
A contest entry
- late September by Namita.
300 points, ended June 8, 2008, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Yes, a very good poem. I don't really like that background, though. But your decision, anyway. This is very wonderful, and filled with the essence of love. Thank you so much for entering.
Namita
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I guess this is love
you paint such a lovely picture
might I add
Mal
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"But it means nothing to me
To see you like that"
Absolutely wonderful. Obviously, there were other sweet words and lines that stood out in the entire poem, but to me the ending was quite something.
Good luck on the contest. Keep writing
Ankita -
"Poetry bleeds from your hands"
This line really struck me for some reason. It just seems very powerful to me, a really good strong image! You really know how to paint a picture! I also like the second verse the best! -
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Thanks a lot, a single decent line makes a poem worth it. If the rest is decent too, all the better ^^
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