don't keep
your feet
still
they'll adhere
to pavement
your legs
will become
foundations
for concrete
office buildings
filled with
yes-men
take out your
chisel
carve out your
dreams and
go
the clouds
and trees
are begging for
your paintbrush
don't become
mountains
be the oceans
that mold them
Author notes
to Diana
read her reply:
http://allpoetry.com/poem/4190755
In a list
A contest entry
- The Battle- Poem off by princess hope.
450 points, ended May 17, 2008, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
-
Magnificent! You've given us another hard hitting, imagery filled punch in the face. "office buildings filled with yes-men" *shudders* been there and if I ever try to go back, put me out of my misery and mount my head on your trophy wall. Here's to oceans.
-
OMG kevin, this is amazing. I wish my comments were a little more insightful, but I am lame. I love you, miss talking to you !
-
Wow...This would defenitely be in my Top Five Favorites in AP as far as poems go. Such insight...You jump from not standing still to having a sky scraper on top of you filled with (yes men-clever)
You have a lot of talent as a poet. Thanks for the read!
Mylee -
First of all, Thank you for specifying who your reply is to, You are one of the very few of the few entries that did that
,
The connection was clear, Fair choice of words and wonderful meanings , Thanks again , and best of luck! =) ,
-
"don't become
mountains
be the oceans
that mold them"
Beautiful writing, with a wonderful message. Very creative, filled with wisdom. A lovely write, this one!
- namita
-
i think you are one of my favorite writers of all time. this was amazing
-
what a fabulous positive message to a friend
take out your
chisel
carve out your
dreams and
go
as simple as that! if only....
-
this is such good advice, I love it from start to finish.
-
i love you.
-
This is very impressive. What an interesting concept and approach you have taken in this poem. Great imagery and very well written. You and Diana have very distinctive styles.
-
The more I read this, the more I love it.
I love the metaphors in it, I love the meaning of it, how much one can get out of it (my first interpretation is proof to that), and the title... What you did with the legend is very creative and all the nature/city life analogy is so smooth.
Thanks so much for thinking of me
You should win this contest
Adding your comment:
1 - 11 of 11
