So much pent up emotions
Yet not a word to express them
The way I want
The way I feel
The sway of your shadow
Grows darker as you walk away
Further and further you go
Colder and colder I bleed
Yet, still I stood frozen
Empty of the voice to broadcast
Words I did not possess
Empty of the courage to make you stay
I reached out with trembling hands
Clutching air, clutching space
I strained my ears
Listening, and listening to the echo of your steps
And like some fellow without a tongue
I let you walk into the dark
As the echo of your presence fades away
And suddenly, disbelievingly
Words failed me not
For it saw through me
And understood me
The one who didn't love you enough.
Author notes
I haven't written a poem in so very long. This is like a warm up.
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Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Well, you did very well on this warmup. Clear images that offer insight into the mental state of a person who is having a hard time expressing themselves the way they wish they could. You have no idea how many times I have felt this way as well. This is something many of us can relate to, and this is what gives this poem a lot of its power.
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I like how you described the whole thing and especially the ending:
And suddenly, disbelievingly
Words failed me not
For it saw through me
And understood me
The one who didn't love you enough.
Good job!! Keep writing ya. Cheers!!
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this left my breathless. I loved it! you managed to capture me throughout the poem and the twist at the end...well that just sums it up unexpectedly.
weldone x
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Wow
Bloody brilliant, well written, full of passion, I understand it and feel the pain. Deep stuff. Yet words it alone are not enough for this passionate piece. Very touched and very moved by the poem. I give you 3 applauds! Thank you! Words I have thought but never put on paper.
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thank you for entering and good luck
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I love it! It really touches the soul and makes you think....
especially these lines:
And suddenly, disbelievingly
Words failed me not
For it saw through me
And understood me
The one who didn't love you enough
-gracy-
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thanks for entering! and you did a great job for just a warm up! I loved reading this piece! thanks agaian and good luck
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You've done very well for being just a warm up. XD I say it's more like ON FIRE!!! *Runs around screaming* FIRE!!! AHH!!!...Ahem...Sorry... Awsome job.
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"So much pent up emotions
Yet not a word to express them
The way I want
The way I feel"
I've been in this place before so many times, you've conveyed it very well, the thoughts and emotions are wonderfully done, and the description and wording is beautiful. A wonderful poem, especially for a warm up.
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