Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Cutting Flesh

Vampires

form around me

smelling my blood

ready to attack.

They lunge toward me

 Today, I become one of them.

 

Author notes

Woo! exactly 20 words! I love short poems. Don't dis too much, but I'm open for a bit of criticism.

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • Shahrazad
    May 5, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Big fan of vampires!

    The last line really makes the poem... it's a great turn in the very short story you've outlined here- cool because the speaker will be TURNED into a vampire just as the story turns. I liked it. There was a genuine element of fear and readiness in that last line that I adored. Good job- thanks for entering the contest!