It is cold outside. The sky is overcast and gray. Off in the distance I can see lightning as it strikes and hear the thunder of a fast approaching storm. The musky smell of rain is in the air. Suddenly a drop of rain hits my head. Then another and another until finally it is raining at a steady pace.
Quickly I pull my felt cap down around my cold ears. I cross my arms against my chest in a vain attempt at keeping warm. However, it does not take long before I start to shiver from the cold. Nevertheless, I am determined to watch you as you leave.
It is your choice. It has always been. I need you to understand that I will not force you into something that you do not want or need.
Suddenly you pause in your heart-wrenching damnable slow-paced walk briefly to look back at me with those wonderfully expressive dark eyes of yours. You look torn. Like a being pulled in two different directions at once. Indecision, usually a rare trait for you, briefly shows on your usually stoic expression. You softly sigh. And I hear the pain you are feeling deep within my heart.
Hope eternal begins to spring within my wildly beating heart only to be shattered once again, as you turn back and continue your ever so slow but deliberate walk away from me.
Truly, I do not understand the decision you have made. Do you think that I will not miss you? Or do you think that I will just turn around and forget all about you. Do you not realize that you were the best thing to happen to me?
So I stand here out in the cold rain watching heart-brokenly, as you continue to walk slowly away from me. Yearning to reach out and touch you. Trying desperately to understand this terrible decision, you have made. Struggling deep inside myself to accept that which I feel I cannot change. Wondering silently what it is that has led us to this place. Praying with everything that I am that we do not end here.
Author notes
I dunno if this one fits but it's kind of waiting... waiting to see if their relationship survives... you make the decision on whether or not it is what you want.
In a list
A contest entry
- loving someone you cant by loving.
400 points, ended June 6, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dead Inside by XxSuicidal-LovexX.
1500 points, ended August 9, 2008, 43 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Win me over by Beyond Broken.
315 points, ended August 23, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Waiting for the train to come in by marmac.
450 points, ended February 18, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
-
This portrays the exact feeling I wanted from the contest! But I'm specifically looking for a poem, sorry. Thanks for the entry.
-
This was very good. Very descriptive. Great imagery thanks for entering.
-
Wonderful
Very well done. So very touching. Thank you for sharing.
-
*exhale*
This was beyond heartbreaking to read. I hate breakups so much. Nothing like 2 people parting ways in this form to make me all misty-eyed. Great job, fellow poet.
-
-
Your comments on my story/poem Decisions
I am so glad that you liked it. I love to write emotional poems. And I love to get the reader to "feel" what the characters are feeling. And I think that if I have succeeded in doing so then I have succeeded in making a good poem.
Your words made me feel that with this poem I had succeeded in writing a good one.
Thanks for your kind words.
trekkergirl
-
-
wow
your ending is fabulous..so gripping..thanx so much for sharing and best of luck in the contest..blessings..namaste..
-
-
your comment on my poem Decision
I appreciate your wonderful words on my poems. I love to share my work with others. I am glad that you enjoyed reading it.
And thanks for the good luck in the poem contest. I hope I do well with it too.
Thanks again for sharing your comments. They made me feel like I have succeeded in doing a good thing.
trekkergirl
-
-
Learning to let go
Learning to let go, is exactly that; a process. A process of lessons in acceptance, humilty, rejection, anger, sadness, and then hopefully at some point, forgiveness and understanding.
This process is rarely a "once and for all" decisive moment; it's more often than not a nano second by nano second journey of reminding your self to just let go.
And then some time later, we realize and understand that behind every cloud awaits the sun; the nurturing and healing life giving sun. Life carries on.
A heart wrenching story spoken in an eloquent and confident voice. The setting and your vivid and powerful visuals played out like a movie in my head. Bravo!
-
-
Your comments on my poem Decisions
Thank you very much for such a wonderful comment about my poem. I loved writing this one because it was so sad... so heart wrenching... so emotional... that as I wrote it I could feel the confusion and emotions that the watcher felt. And the hope that the watcher had for the future... a hope that perhaps they could get back to gether in the future.
I think that all loves that break up... even for a short time... have this hope. Even if it is a short lived hope. Kind of a "what if..." type of thought process if you know what I mean.
I am very glad that you liked this.
Thanks again for sharing such a wonderful comment.
Hugs
trekkergirl
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 9 of 9
