Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Crystal Clear

Climbing through
open
iris windows
past
hazel curtains
gazing
amazed
                breathless
at the glassy
crystal shard,
at the soul
before him
                  his soul

With every angle
and every view
the faceted stone
reflected
with clarity
his being
his meaning
                  beautiful

Mirrored
kaleidoscopic
he watched his image
growing
living
laughing
learning
dying
                peaceful


Another passed
through the same
iris windows
behind hazel curtains
where the soul
was held
but in its place
all she could see
was an
old
muddy
                  rock





Author notes

prompt-- paint a self picture with words and tie in existentialism

whoa........i can say for sure this was the toughest contest yet

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • ArtFullyMe gold member
    May 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Love the iris windows and hazel curtains, it's distinctly self, without the weight of "I".

    Thank you for your entry


  • LadyUnique silver member
    May 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    two totally different ways of looking at life. you've shown this well
    this is going into the finalist list. it's getting crowded in there good luck!


  • Lotus-Mama
    May 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow! Tangible imagery! Deep and beautiful! Good luck in the contest!


  • Catie Sheeran gold member
    April 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Hey, thanx for the comment
    anyway, i didn't know you joined the same contest..lol. Great poem, by the way. Beautiful beginning and Powerful ending! The 3 middle stanzas are just genius. and the ending beyond genius. i think this is one of your best!


    • eltortedequeso
      April 30, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      aw thank you! i hope it was ok to join with you i really do believe you have a strong poem there and im excited to see the outcome, best wishes always ~


      • Catie Sheeran gold member
        April 30, 2008
        Edit | Reply
        omg...are you kidding me? I hope you win...Im in love with your poem! ...lol


  • PsydewaysTears gold member
    April 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    wow

    i think it's great, and very sad but is wonderfully poetic nonetheless. i think your muddy rock is beautiful and much more than it seems


  • background music
    April 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I think you nailed this one! I love the descriptions and the comparison of the two different views on how one see's themeselves very insightful... something just about anyone can relate to! Good luck for the contest.

1 - 9 of 9