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Luminous Illusion

Cluttered chaos 
occupies this vessel
sailing through a dream
Lost in a luminous illusion
Mesmerized
by monster lies
and lavender butterflies
       
Where truth is false
Love is not eternal
and life is merely
a period in a cycle

     
       
       
       

       

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • badnovocaine
    November 15, 2008

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    Oh nice I love the ending, life is merely a period in a cycle!!! This was so creative, at first i clicked on the poem and the beginning sounded like me:
    cluttered chaos occupies this vessel
    Nice job here.


  • ArtFullyMe gold member
    May 24, 2008
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    I think you did an excellent job. This paints an image as well as captures the basic essence of existentialism though there may be a bit more to the concept than no purpose to existence ...
    sometimes I suspect it was trying to say there's no purpose to existence without co-existence but of course that's my personal take on the philosophy

    thank you




  • wendymolly
    May 24, 2008
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    the very essence of the topic at hand!


  • Forgotten truth
    April 30, 2008

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    WOW I love this great poem, I love it so much ill book mark it... ill have read some more of your work.. I love the ending…the rim is unreal... and I like the Ider,, i have been thinking about dreaming alott… somewhere where we are hold down but our doubts .. Where we don’t care how we look... how much money we have or what we do for a living,

  • celadia
    April 30, 2008

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    I found this interesting but on thing, 'occupies this vessel' What vessel? Maybe you just liked the words, well that's fine but I thought I would give you my opinion, it does not make sense the way you have it, I feel. The imagery is great, the butterflies, your comment on falsehood is a good insight and just to be a little argumentative, I think life is always a period unless you mean that truth can live on if you live your life truthfully, yes that is true. You do have very good talent, I think. I have improved a lot on this site with much less than you have. I think you will do well.


    • Catie Sheeran gold member
      April 30, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Hey thanx for the comment...i understand what you mean about the word vessel...i meant it to be me or my body as a ship sailing through this journey...but maybe i should have elaborated on this idea. or maybe your right...i just liked the word...lol. thanx for the opinion...i will look the poem over again and see if i can fix that and make it better...


      • eltortedequeso
        April 30, 2008

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        i definitely got that the vessel was you! i wouldnt change a line sweetie!!! best of luck to you


  • eltortedequeso
    April 29, 2008
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    You go girl! a little break time goes a long long way! im excited to see what you come up with


  • ArtFullyMe gold member
    April 29, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    take your time

    no hurry..

1 - 9 of 9