Written on a piece of paper were the words I Tried!
She hung from the rope swaying from side to side.
Blood trickled from the gash on her wrists.
Self mutilation they all whispered.
It's her own damn fault someone shouts.
No one read the words underneath I Tried.
Scribbled in black ink,
Forming her suicide note.
I Tried!
(I Tried) to be a good daughter.
(I Tried) to be a loyal friend.
(I Tried) to be something I am not.
(I Tried) to tell the truth of who I was.
(I Tried) and Tried to hold my head up from the blows that no one saw.
I try now and everyone sees.
Why couldn't they see before.
That I was me!
The letter remained unread.
People went about their days.
I stood there and watched her body sway.
"I am that girl!" I shout but no one hears.
Slowly I began to disappear saying "I Tried!"
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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I like the way you tell the story from the victoms eyes awesome writing thanks for the read and keep on writing
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Oh, so fantastic. What a piece of writing. It hurts to read it, so sweet and sad. How often does this sort of thing have to happen with people mistreated by this cruel world.
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wow
this poem is amazing. wow. wow. wow thats all i can say
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Just a quick comment to say thanks for entering this into my contest, sorry you didnt win but obviously there can only be three trophies given, which is a shame cause in this contest there deserved to be alot more winners! xxx
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thank you for entering and good luck
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this is awsome very touchin i luv it sad .. miss ya baby luv this poem it was awsome...
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Dam you
This was wonderful. You know I do have a image to keep, and all this crying is not helping. You know how much I love the dark, but dark and sad. awwww why.....no jk this was ...well no words....lost for words. A pleasure to read, thank you
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Thanks. Well I am sorry that it made you cry but it is very moving to have people think that there are things that happen like this eveyday.
I am glad you love this one as well as for everyone else.
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Wow, that is extremely dark and gloomy but something about it was absolutely electrifying. I love the repetition of (I Tried) that added more depth to the poem itself. I love your last two lines as well. 'I am that girl!' I shout but no one hears/Slowly I begin to disappear saying 'I Tried!' I think that was one hell of a twist! I really don't know what else to say. I knew you had a heck of a talent but, this exceeds what even I thought. Wonderful, amazing job love.
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Thanks so much for the lovely comment as always. I am really glad you like this one. I hope to write more that are like this that get peoples attention!
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You know I'm going to at least attempt to leave a comment on all of your work. I think you have a wonderful talent. I wish you the very best of luck.
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It's really good...very sad...kinda like a horrible nightmare...but very good!
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Thanks for the comment!
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