hey.
.
slowly
goodbyes diffuse
into grey nothings
at the back
of your empty look
and long laugh
.
we used to
scream, you know
so that we’d loosen up
just in time
for English class.
there were
water-drinking-contests
when I always won.
of course.
I lost april fools’ hands down
I was the april fool;
well.
I guess I still am.
.
those were crazy times
but I still don’t miss you.
maybe another day.
.
coffee?
Author notes
Username: checkmate
Age : 16
I've been on AP since 2005.
I'm on AP at least twice a week.
A contest entry
- Audition Round by Blooming Poet.
300 points, ended May 14, 2008, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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wow!
I think this poem is so sad yet I love the genius behind it. The wit I meant not the poet. kidding! The dots add short pauses which are effective in conveying different spaces of time.
"I lost april fools’ hands down
I was the april fool;"
I didn't even have to try.
I loved how the poem ended almost like a conversation towards the end. love you loads.
transit~
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-
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oh I just love you.
-
oh my god!
Charu charu charu!
let me say something gal, i'm so proud of you! i love this piece so much! it's so downright to the hard core truth! This is like "in your face" kind of a poem! And i totally love the idea of bringing back sad memories... suh that when someone reads it they're probably thinking "oh! another sad memory... she probably wants to return to these times" you know... the type where u crave for your childhood memories!(at least i thought so) but man! this was nothing like that... Your last few lines were insane!
BRILLIANT!
i think i've said enough, basically to summarise all that blabering i did before... POWERFUL IMAGERY, EMOTIONS! HEART-FELT! BRILLIANTLY UNIQUE STRUCTURE! I LOVE IT!
oh and your "water drinking contests"... you said "of course u won" GOSH! well anyways... have a nice day! LOVE YOU!
tea? (coffe. tea. gettit? o' forget it!*sigh*)
Ranji
tea?
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