from now on I'm not going to obsess
and this says it may cause drowsiness
life makes me cry and I wish I was dead
three of these may cause drowsiness
I failed before and I won't fail again
but if I fail it says what to do right on the bottle
I love you so much
I love you to pieces
but I'm drowsy
I want to hold you tight
but I'm about to fall asleep
I want to do all kinds of things
but I'm about to fall asleep
I hope I don't forget before I wake up
maybe tomorrow afternoon
tonight was a full moon
but we'll see the next one soon
when I've had enough
Author notes
This is the first poem I've ever posted. Nice to be here.
What is the connection between the first line and the narrator's portrayal of affection?
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Welcome to Allpoetry.
This is a very nice written piece, kinda deep dark and sad and I hope it is just a poem.
Thank you for your entry and good luck in the contest.
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Welcome to AllPoetry!
There is a certain factor of fear and sadness I feel from the words. Loss would not even begin to describe the gammut of emotions expressed.
But at the same time, I do hope this is just an expression and not part of your actual days. Stay strong and keep writing.
~Storm -
to me its like ur expressing that u love a special someone but its slowly dying away its a wonderful poem i can relate to it ALOT about a certain sos
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Lovely
This poem catches a different portrayal of love, in my opinion. Moreso of a "i don't want to let go but I feel myself slowly dying" type of thing. Then again, I never was very good at reading between the lines...
Anyhoot.
Not bad for your first poem. I'm sure you'll manage to write in a specific style like everyone else here, even if your popular for writing freeverse like myself. I can't wait to read some of your other peices.
♠ Ice Phoenix ♠
[Mell]
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Very well done!
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Damn!
Great write...im just speachless...
wow!
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