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Teasing Trails

Loving attention I get from your tongue,
trailing my senses as when we were young.
The urges the same, when lust was our game,
you still can lay claim to this wanton dame.

 

My hands in your hair pushing you down to me,
Awaiting that kiss that will soon set me free
that desire herein, played like a violin.
Moistness on skin, please enter within.

 

Lying and waiting for lip to meet lip.
Now celebrating your tongue's very tip.

 

 

Author notes

Photography supplied by Clarity of Vision

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A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Desire gold member
    August 15, 2008

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    Thank You!!

    Thank You for Your entry: Teasing Trails
    This piece tugged hard and awakened everything dormant While I was reading which I do several times~ Images come to me in many forms~ while taking in Your words: trailing my senses- also lip to meet lip
    No picture needed for Your words speak for themselves-
    Lovely rhyme and form penned also- I'm making a mention on many writes-- As one of the judges, I'll mention what I notice but I don't like to butcher another person's work- I'm not a poetic guru and will never claim to be- this is just a personal note: I noticed on line 6- You capitalized *Awaiting* after the comma and I do that with words I want to emphasize~ for some reason this particular capital did not feel like an emphasis so wanted to toss Your way for review - but I understood what You meant I won't write a novel of a comment this time but in summary
    Magnificent pre-write entered ~
    Congratulations on Your award earned
    Challenge Matrix:
    spelling/grammar/punctuation- 20
    presentation/creativity- 20
    how well you handled the challenge-20
    "grab me" effect (how much did we enjoy reading this piece)-20
    overall-20
    For a total of 100 points
    Sensual images & message You have brought forth

    Thank You for sharing Your Talent!
    Hope to read more...
    Best wishes to You in the challenge Sweet Soul
    **Judging will be done shortly...
    Many blessings too
    and much love & light~ Desire~*~


  • tanzanite
    August 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I agree with Ktulu on this one. I thought this was very well written. Well done on this piece. It hit the spot. Love your rhyming skills too.


  • Master Ktulu silver member
    August 14, 2008

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    oooh this is very well penned. Short, sweet and much delight. Definately a well note worthy finalist.

    **Master Ktulu**


  • Unsigned gold member
    April 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    oh my word!!!!!!!

    *stutters*

    um..well...yes!

    very vivid and I find it really hard to leave here!

    Simon

  • Nighttime angel
    April 28, 2008

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    this is one very HOT poem. you did an excellent job with the picture. Outstanding.. poem, just Outstanding

    good luck

    kat


  • MysticalRayne
    April 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is another great erotica one done tastefully ~ brava and best of luck


  • craftyangel43
    April 28, 2008

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    Very good Jem Ma'am....runs and quickly turns the fan on . I loved it. It leaves the imagination wet for more. *smiles*. Thank You for sharing and good luck in the contest.
    crafty


  • The Poetic Angel
    April 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    well Jems m'Lady wot can i say bout this apart from WOW its Awsome butiful read to wake up to

    fantastik take on pix

    Good luck in the contest

    xxx Your angel xxx


  • crazymomma
    April 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    OOH! Great poem from the picture. I love the rhyme and how hot this is. Luis, my love, I need you right now. LOL!

1 - 9 of 9