Six times you died,
a repetitive Christ
or Lazarus.
Each time, they found your
skeletal foetus
curled soft.
You pistol fingered
your brain to oblivion,
we dragged you back.
Pounded electric on nerve
poured love on your loathing,
replaced the life within,
then watched the cycle
begin again.
A contest entry
- Damaged and broken by zochit2me.
900 points, ended May 3, 2008, 21 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything and everything-prewrites allowed-2nd contest by Midgetbridgey.
350 points, ended July 11, 2008, 245 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
So sad. I hope things become better if this is from your life experiences. I like the way it flowed to the ending line. Pen on...~Poo~
-
Thanks for sharing this. It's so sad that so many find themselves trapped in a cycle like this, or watching one helplessly from the outside.
-
I guess we've all known someone who needs to grow up and realize that we all have reason to live and be happy. This is pretty good. Frequently I find myself thinking one thing or another is just too vague. This one a whole lot less. I like this. - oce
-
This is so saddening, I've been in this cycle before and it's always hard to view someone elses view of your, or more so a similar situation to yours. You penned this very well, thank you for sharing.
-
Very good but sad as well. I have a family member that has attempted suicide many times. This really hit home with me.
-
ooo this poem was very chill giving. the imagery left me near speachles
-
It has a different impact on me than I was expecting, because I can't place a label on how it makes me feel. Thank you for entering.
-
This has impact!
Kind of struck a nerve with me because of personal things in my life.
Dealing with someone who is determined to die is a hard reality.
Very well done and out of the box for sure.
Becky
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
