Over my tears,
as my love turns
to great waves of fury.
You promised you'd be there,
But you're not,
not since that bitch
took over your heart.
Author notes
I don't really think this is that great of a poem. I would like honest criticism, be tough. I would like to know any way I could fix it. This is only my second free verse, too, so I don't really know how great it is.
A contest entry
- Quickie Contest! by GypsyEyes.
300 points, ended May 3, 2008, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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i mean for 30 words it pretty fantastic! i think that is the start of a really good poem if you want to take in further
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oh im bookmarking this! my friend needs to read this! omg! wow
thank you so much for entering and best of luck to you!
~NineTailedFox
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