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The Crack in the Door

What do you see in her?

Or is it what you don't see in me?

Maybe it's her well fixed hair,

Or do you see a soul there?

All I can see,

Is what appears to me,

When I am on the outside,

But looking in.






I've never wanted to be so inside before.

See what people are like for myself.

Their real personality.

The light,

And everything that you do,

Shines through the crack in the Door.






Not until I really saw your face,

Did I wish,

Maybe that I could be like them.

And on the inside.

Instead,

I am just looking through the crack in the Door.




Are you as wonderful as you seem?

What do you see in her,

That I can't see,

Through the crack in the Door?

Author notes

I READ RULES

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • kavi22
    July 6, 2008

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    This was full of wonderful metaphor and sends a great message. It didn't really follow the topic of the contest though. thanks for entering!

  • OurxBeginning
    June 23, 2008

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    Interesting piece. Not quite what I was looking for, but I did enjoy your creativity. Hope this wasn't true, and if so I am sorry. Thanks for entering and good luck.


  • MrCrepsley
    June 15, 2008

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    Wow!!!!! Nice poem. I know exactly how you feel. My boyfriend went for another girl. Do you know why. He saw me singing in a play and then my friend Amelia sang and he dumped me then asked her out. How lame? She said no of course. But still. This is really emotional and I feel like I was there. If you enter this in a competition where it could be published i bet this would get first prize. Thanks and good luck!!!!!


  • sassykitty
    May 20, 2008
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    i like the metaphor of the crack in the door and the way you use it to depict your situation - it's definitley one a lot of us can relate to. The rhetorical questions at the end are also effective - this is an honest and heartfelt poem, thanks for sharing.


  • HereComesTheSun
    May 18, 2008

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    i really like this poem becuase its very open to the truth about personality and yet figurativly its wonderful great job


  • Sweet-Pea7
    May 2, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    true true i know exactly how that feels.

1 - 6 of 6