Don’t suppress me like a taste
Cover me in your sticky chocolate paste
Take a lick of my poisoned flavored kiss
Tighten the rope that binds me to care
To know you I can’t even bare
I wish I never knew you
Your kiss left my lips swollen blue
My heart hardened over
Hatred leaves sugar high nor sober
I will live to be happy
Maple syrup love so sappy
Sweetened to the touch
Entangle bodies on a couch
Candy coated seduction
Better then your sour flavored passion
It was never more then inflicted drama
Our love is just a Candy Bar with larva
Author notes
haha prsonly this one was so fun to write
I ended up surprising myself
Option #3: Anger? Frustration? Confusion? I think we all know how that feels. Betrayal, even? Yeah. Write me something raw.
A contest entry
- Save me from Myself by luna-midnight.
450 points, ended April 26, 2008, 5 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Abstract Expressions by Aralyn Leighanna.
485 points, ended April 27, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Options !! [PW ALLOWED!] by innocence jaded.xx.
625 points, ended July 13, 2008, 47 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - PreWrite contest for my favorites/AP family/and group!!! by Kathraina.
1055 points, ended February 15, 290 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Hate! Prewrite's allowed by Ami.
550 points, ended July 12, 86 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
do you understand the concept...did you like it?
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Judged-ola!
"Take a lick of my poisoned flavored kiss"
brilliant line!
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Amazing. Beautiful. Fun. Uplifting. Metaphoric. PERFECT. The few words to describe this poem. It was definitely different, & I think that's why I enjoyed reading it so much. Thank you so much for entering, love :] Best of luck to youuu ! ♥
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Excellent
I really like the way you keep using the reference to the candy in this one. I would drop the sixth line if it was me. It seems a bit redundant, and the us of you in two lines in a row. Great Write! ~Peace~Gar -
I ABSOLUTLY LOVE this!
lol it was so fun to read!
Thanks so, so much for entering and good luck! -
its option 2
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well what option did you use, 1 or 2...i need to know before i actually comment, lol.
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This is awesome!! I loved the end line:
"Our love is just a Candy Bar with larva"
So catchy. I liked also how you rubbed it in whoever's face that you were going to be so much happier with someone else along the line. lol Fantastic job here! Good luck in the contest.
I'm sure you'll do awesome! ^_^
-Lily♥
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