The bells rang and the days began
With numbers, words and vowels
And the preaching ( so called teaching)
Of a nutty old owl
Abused my ear drums
‘Setting us up for life’ – she said
A line from “If” she read
Like as if you’ll be a man my son
Mattered when I was ten
And so the years moved on from
Marbles and pitch and toss
( which I never won)
To this damp dreary council house
I’m 3o looking like 50
Unemployed but well read now
And the words of Kipplan
Make sense now…
I’ve yet to become a man,
Just like my dad before me...
And the nutty old owl was right.
A contest entry
- Snapshots by Floorboards.
600 points, ended May 14, 2008, 8 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ~ pre-writes ~ by LadyUnique.
300 points, ended May 8, 2008, 61 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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This is really good, love the little rhymes you've managed to squeeze in. Liked the lines about not being a man like your dad before you, very evocative I must say, think it could have been even better with a slightly different ending, it's very good but could have been terrific I feel. Thank you so much for entering my contest and good luck to you,
Floorboards.
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Thank you so much for entering my contest, I shall comment properly soon,
Alex. -
a few years ago... okay maybe more than that... i realized i was turning into my parents and that scared the crap outta me
you words perfectly describe what i always heard adults say when i was younger... "you'll understand (or be sorry) when you get older
clever title too
thanks for entering and good luck
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thank you for your kind comments
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Good muse here
This truly hits many and no none of us ever want to become our parents yet as the time slowely creeps in one day we gwet a glance and at that time asks where did all the time go
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thank you for your thoughtful kind words
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Well done. I really like your thoughts in this. It flows so naturally and your imagery is excellent!
All the best with this
Gaylene
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thank you your comments mean so much especially since your such a fine poetess
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