The seed of man
The roots are unrevealed
Infected, the veins start to glow
Cruelty and the concrete blocks surrounding me
A frozen personality stares; the show starts
Report the issue, a riot just begun
Get rid of the disease
The antidote started its production
Regret myself
The best of man
The veiled senses appear
Unfreezing the buried honesty
A sequence starts to loop and loop: The sound of erosion
Give rise to the existing patterns and feelings
Your honesty is needed, stoning the hard skin
The pride of man against the leecher's dreams
Return to the barbarian concepts
Exterminating the differences between man and me
The worst of man
The hive of hard working ants
There is no freedom with the lusty nails
Ripping, scratching the sleep of principles of humanity
The laws are modified but the braincells remain
Synaptic processes, distorted but working with the obvious
The misfit grows behind your eyes, inept humans
As he licks the ground, feeding with dirt
Sleep on your perfection, disallow the spectator
The beast of man
What are you afraid of now?
Isolated is the position given to me
Get the perceptions of a disease refused
Refused by both elites and ghettos of oblivious 46 genes
Leftover, no medicines going to heal the wound
The open fields and the crops feeding everyone
But the new moon's harvest freezes my throat
Abandonment surrounds the child and its disease
Author notes
Had to write about people I want around or that are around but... uh, you know. I hope this poem defines the feeling of solitude of my persona in every place I try to fit on, from first grade of primary school to AllPoetry itself.
"Cadaver Cafe: Special Today- GraveRobber Goulash" <- Rules of the contest.
A contest entry
- And you... were only their option. by Vickery.
450 points, ended May 6, 2008, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Punching Holes In Hapiness by FakingItForReal.
300 points, ended July 28, 2008, 8 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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In the first stanza, instead of the word 'unrevealed' you should use a word like 'hidden'
(though, don't use the word hidden, expand that vocabulary)
I don't really know how to critique this without being biased. This is not my style at ALL and that may or may not be a good thing. It was an interesting read, thanks for entering.
Sorry for the lack of luster in this commen -
Quite an interesting read, I am adding it to the finalist's list ^_^
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