5 Stages of an Emotional Earthquake

Slow and sporadic
Like water from a proken faucet
Each drop an ingredient
Of emotional compression
Drip after drip
Stain after stain
Memories and accounts of the smallest measure
Transparently mound themselves
Through the poking and prodding
Of the cerebral cortex
Moments of frustration, anger and suppression
Multiply from one cell to the next
Seeking new flesh
Seeking for an epicenter
As conscious thought countracts with repression
But my mindful awareness
Can only hold on for so long

I know these things are happening to me
I sense when someone makes me uneasy
But, rather than release my tension,
I bottle it up
Deep inside my core
Parasitic portions of frustration
Eat away at my being
Charging in militia formation
Attacking my emotional center
Causing it to break little by little
Forming an arid barrier
Around each amygdala of my limbic system
Forbidding the passing of anger and fear
Allowing me to produce an overabundance of happiness
Pseudo-happiness
How I love such feelings of comfort
When they are not the cover for my inability to express negativity
I do not take pleasure from this mask
But others enjoy my positive aura
Therefore I allow the prodding of my negative emotions
For the sake of keeping the peace amongst kin
However temporary the amity may be

Nudge after nudge
Poke after poke
Stab after stab
Of emotional cruelty
Widens each wound
Deepens each mental crevice
Allows for more harm
To inflict itself upon my last raw nerve
I fight with my last resisting urge
To keep the pain out of my mind
Blowing it away
Stabbing it right back
Telling the negativity that I do not want it
Thinking of joyous times
Remembering life
Outside of such treacherous events
That cause my positive force field to flicker
But they keep attacking from every angle
Flowing past my epidermis
Soaking through my cranial muscles
Rushing my skull, eyes, and ears as acid rain
Penetrating my brain to the brink of collapse
Only to pave the way for something bigger

A chemical spark of insanity
Sends a shockwave up my spine
Triggering an explosion
Of negative emotional instability
The last pinprick of a minute occurance
Broke my emotional dam
Tears flow
Screeches fly
No one can save me from myself
No one can stop the short-circuit behind my eyes
I have no control as my brain splits
Separating the logical from emotional
I do all I can to hold my tongue and clamp my teeth
As the sound of my sobbing becomes unbearable
The attempt at ripping out my larynx
Fails as I know it would be far too painful
And worthless in the end
All I can do is let it out
As my horrendous sounds are set free
Flooding the world of indifference around me
Pushing the negativity from my body

Our of tears
No longer carrying a voice
My eyes are tired and body is exhausted
From the endless heaving and wailing
I wish for nothing more than to sleep
A dreamless sleep of utter peace
Leaving my breakdown in the past
Save for a sheen that lines my cortex
Ever so slightly pricking my thoughts
Never letting me forget those memories
That caused my eventual fall
Making me build from them
Adding to a stronger being
Allowing me to rise above
And leave all those hateful entities behind