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Stay Your Blade

You wield a blade within your mouth,
A blade that hangs out of it's scabbard.
It cuts down the strongest,
And It's wounds are eternal.
Before, the blade stayed sheathed,
Now, you have cut me down.
You slash and slash,
stay your blade.
These wounds won't heal.
stay your blade.
You plunged you blade through my heart.
stay.
laughing as the deed was done.
your.
Your were maddened.
Blade.
As I lay here,
My soul bleeding.
I ask you to,
Stay your blade.

A contest entry

My "friend" started a rumour about me, and it got out of hand

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Comments

1 - 7 of 7
  • Juno101
    September 6
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    great metaphors. Interesting.


  • HeavensDaughter
    June 6, 2008

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    Powerful write! Wow! I do know betrayal and you have written well about it.

    I like this wording:
    "You wield a blade within your mouth,
    A blade that hangs out of it's scabbard.
    It cuts down the strongest,
    And It's wounds are eternal."

    Your use of language is creative. The repetition of "stay your blade" is a powerful message. I wish that she HAD stayed her blade. Just as I wish that all would recognize what you have expressed here...that the tongue CAN be a wounding sword and does need to be stayed!


  • MusicMattnessLives
    April 30, 2008

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    this was good but i'm oblivious to the phrase "stay your blade". sorry. but i do understand the poem. its describing about how the best friend turned his/her back on you and cut you down with his/her words. am i right? blease tell me if i am. good luck and good write.


  • individuality gold member
    April 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    makes me think of the film highlander to begin with but then you move towards a broken heart and i move away from that imagery, a good poem, ah the name chase i saw, i was chasing the day in here for awhile


  • XXCrimsonRaineXX
    April 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I really enjoyed reading this. It had a lot of anger behind it. By the way, there's a typo in the third line. Thank you, and good luck in my contest.

    XXCrimsonRaineXX

1 - 7 of 7