If I beyond the earth could leap
And snare the planets from their way
And give them to my love, to keep
My heart fore’er, lest mind do fray -
Lest Time its wounds on me doth reap
And fell our love and it decay -
If I beyond the earth could leap
And snare the planets from their way.
But I in Death shall never sleep
If I my life before you lay
That in your heart’s pure cleft might stay
And Death not chain me to the deep -
If I beyond the earth could leap
And snare the planets from their way.
Author notes
My first attempt at a rondel, inspired by Shakespeare's sonnets. <3 Particularly the portrayal of Time. I know the rondel is kind of strange; but I like it. I always have been better at more formal poetry. . .
A contest entry
- Anything Goes by vampireprincess.
315 points, ended June 25, 2008, 59 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - There's a First for Everything... by Lamia.
800 points, ended April 13, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
Although I'm not completely familiar with the form I'd say you've got an excellent handle on it. This was exceptionally well written and kept a nice steady rhythm which made it all the more enjoyable. It has a bit of a haunting tone to it, but somehow not...I don't know. It was a pleasure to read all the same. Thank you for entering and good luck in the contest
-
A rondel!
A form that I have little knowledge of. You did well with it. Now I begin to see the emerging style that is to become your signature. Your romantic form poetry succeeds where mine fails. You make yours believable.
-
-
*stunned* thank you much! this marks the turning point in my work, where I got really serious about writing. . .
-
-
This is beautiful... good write!
-
awesomeee
i stumbled upon your poem by chance and it was worth worth worth reading it wonderfull poem such a great write good lucks in da contest
-
Amazing.... I loved it.. I love Shakespeare's sonnets... and this is really good. It's well written, and it flows really nicely... well done. So good luck and good job
-
wow this is really beautiful. I have no idea what a rondel would be, but this is really a good write.
-
-
Thanks a lot! I was hoping my baby would make it. . .
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
