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The Grim Reaper (My Life for Yours Saga IV)

"Another soul is mine for the taking.
Another soul, mine for a meal.
Another soul, plumped up with emotion.
Another soul for death to steal.


You shall come with me lover
Come and be taken.
You agreed to the price,
Your life is forsaken."


 "I cannot leave, not yet, I can't

I need to tell her I love her, tell her how I feel.

She needs to know that I shall be with her

Just a little more time, then we'll go through with this deal."

 

"I make the rules mortal, not you or your lover.

You made a deal, and it's time that it's done.

For if you don't comply, then the first is set,

And her life is forfeit, her life is gone.

 

I've waited for long, I shall wait no more

I've been patient enough, I am patient no longer,

I am death, I am the one

That takes away souls, to feed my immortal hunger."

 

"We are leaving, you're taking me away.

But one question before we depart.

I know nothing, so tell me of this,

Will she remember me always, remember me in her heart.?"

 

Death looked at his prey, a grin crept on his face

His eyes twinkled with delight as he readied his blow

This one would hurt his victim, he mused on with glee,

Hollowed eyes wide in excitement he answered him slow.

 

"I wish I could help you, truly I do,

But sorry to say, with this deal you must go,

Since I am immortal, I know what shall pass

The answer you seek, well the answer is NO."

Author notes

Weird rhyme scheme. Only Death flows. It is not suppose to truly flow. The beginning is, but afterwards, the two just converse. It so happens to rhyme.

Death finally arrives to take one of them away.

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Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • Evenstar gold member
    October 8

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    different, as to yet i'm not used to you rhyming, but this was still good,and interesting,and still sad as well. In a way, this reminds me of Romeo and Juliet, but only this is more in depth with a deal with death.as well as a few other different aspects. Unique, in its own way.


  • sgking123 silver member
    September 1

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    excelelnt

    you openedd so very powerfully and took the meaning right into the heart fo the raeder.I loved quite a bit of this opening:

    Another soul is mine for the taking.
    Another soul, mine for a meal.
    Another soul, plumped up with emotion.
    Another soul for death to steal

    and..you ended being immortal and having the powers to be..well done. visit me and comment me as well.


  • StarlightCerulean
    September 1
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    An intense poem for an intense topic. Well done.

  • Bipride93
    September 1
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    sounds like stuff i used to write. i really like it.


  • Uniquely-Scarred
    September 1
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    i really enjoyed this


  • individuality gold member
    September 1

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    a good piece that spins language into another realm with fine grace and ease, ah sweet death, it shall come for us all and ravage us with its fine boned hands, and there is nothing we can do to stop it.


  • Angelflower
    April 24, 2008

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    oh I'm going to have a girly moment here!!! this so had me crying in the end!! not cool!!! I have been reading this "Saga" and though it has been somewhat sad it has always had such great imagery.. You just suck the reader into your story that your creating, and then the ending was just so heartbreaking! and yeah the flow might have not been all that great but it seemed like it fit really good with this.. I really enjoyed it like all the others!! Great Job!! Bravo!!

    Jetleena

1 - 7 of 7