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Wait for me

What a sad and lonely way to die,
Naked and bare beneath the sky,
Where wind does howl and cry,

On a lonely hilltop so very high.

Please, please, don't die alone'
I wont be long, I'm just off home
Please, please, don't give up hope,
I'll soon be back, with my rope.

Oh please poor tree,

Wait for me.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Emile
    April 25, 2008
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    Good

    This is a very rhythmic piece of poetry with a sad beat with words of devastation speaking in thunderous whispers. Good imagery and flow are both well presented within these lines. It holds a kind of trance over the reader and they think they are reading other than the obvious. It plays with words to hint at the story underneath the weight of all these witty words.


  • nichtmich silver member
    April 24, 2008
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    Awesome! Had to read that one twice! Unusual perspective on a sort of lover's suicide pact. Taut and concise.


  • Tattboyspet
    April 24, 2008
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    now THIS was outside the box
    I enjoyed this one ... it was a completely different take on the image!
    thank you for your entry


  • felixangel
    April 23, 2008
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    sad great easy flow when said it felt like i was to much pain


  • artis
    April 23, 2008

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    Hey, that's cheating too, I didn't see anything hanging below his belt, so how was he naked???

    lol....sad dirge indeed....hang around a spell and check it...for Lonely...and beneath...otherwise i liked it. ~~Artis

1 - 6 of 6