The night is especially hard.
I want him with me, to feel him
crawl in next to me and hold me close,
to feel his hand following my curves -
marveling at the creature he has tamed,
creating ecstasy from agony with every
brush of his fingers against my skin
until I give in to his ministrations.
But it is only my body under this blanket
and all around the sheets are cold with
the damning absence of someone who was never
present echoing off the walls.
The ecstasy leaves but the agony remains,
a throbbing cavernous hole in my chest, my stomach, my soul.
There is only me, this bed and the darkness
and I hold myself tight in vain, praying to God
to bring sleep quickly and take me away from the silent room.
