In the bedroom she waits with her lustfull eyes
Waiting for her man to fullfill her pleasures
Her pleasures entwined in rope and chains
Entwined in punishment and submission
She begs, she pleads, she screams for him
He watches her, planning his every move
At first, he watches her attempt at begging and gives in
Walking closer, she gets louder
Her clothes thrown on the floor
Her arms tied behind her back
She begs for him to be inside of her
But not so early he won't
Pants unzip with the movement of teeth and mouth
Before she knows it HE inside her mouth
He knows she likes it like this
He knows she won't stop
She begs once more, for his dick inside of her
Nice and wet, a sign of invitation
She likes it rough
Pushed on her stomach on the bed she feels the ropes slip over her ankles
Legs spread apart
Arms spread apart
Every man's dream
She begs to come
Author notes
enjoy option 1
A contest entry
- Secrets of Lust Picture Inspired by ennovy.
800 points, ended April 29, 23 entries
Honorable winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Erotic Desires by Shadow Darkstar.
1800 points, ended May 2, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
critique please, a real one
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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I absolutely love this poem. I may not have felt this way 20 years ago but I get it now and like where you capitalized "He" in the middle of line 14. Sizzling!!
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In contrast to what my brother has written for his comment on thsi peice, I don't personally believe in that kind of pleasure. It seems to be more like torture than pleasureable. But, to each their own, right? The imagery in this piece was astounding, very well thought out, and i thank you for staying within the rules.
One suggestion I'd like to make, however is the following line: "Pushed on her stomach on the bed she feels the ropes slip over her ankles". This seems too long compared to the rest of the poem. I realize you write mostly four linie stanzas, but something withing that one line seems off. Just as a further thought.
Great write, and good luck! ♥ Thank you for entering. -
damn this is hott!!!!
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well penned. i liked the veiled submission with the ropes. all in all i liked how she begs for it... good luck
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Yippi-ti-yi-yo, a-ropin' we'll go *smiles*. Very steamy, I liked it.
Thanks for entering, and good luck in the contest.
Novy and Brazos -
Ooh.. nice and steamy.. I like it.. I'm pleading the fifth on the whole tying her up type thing
.. I really liked this.. Best of luck to you!!
Jetleena
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Hmmm...lustful...but I'm not into the whole "tie me up and I'll pleasure you kinda thing"
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