The springtime coolness of the night comforts me.
The soft sighing of the sleeping men below
rising up through the garden air
reminds me that I am human too.
The olive presses silent,
awaiting the harvest's yield,
just as my father waits for the bitter harvest
I must soon give.
The unforgiving moon hides pale
her face,
somewhere among the clouds that hover,
uncertain as my strength.
Tears of blood mark my cheeks,
exposing my weak heart of doubt.
Even the descending angels,
come down to comfort me,
cannot ease my growing fear
for the dawning anguish chosen,
the torment that waits for me.
Still I welcome their attention,
filling the void left by those who
claim to love me.
Can you not stay awake with me for just a little while?
This path was chosen for me
before the first breath of life filled my chest.
Can this cup not pass from me?
This is my body, this my blood,
willfully given but cherished nonetheless.
I have known the joy of walking,
of speaking,
of being heard.
I have been the first,
the last,
and at the end of things
the in between as well.
Father, if this is what you require of me
I will drink this bitter cup to the dregs.
No other path presents itself.
So be it.
The dancing light of torches,
born by fisted hands,
have hemmed us in.
Those who would deny me
now draw swords to bar my way,
but it is not their fate to live and die
by such as this.
The loving kiss of betrayal stings my cheek,
but I feel neither remorse nor anger,
nor contempt for he who turned.
His path too was laid before his feet before his birth.
With quiet acceptance I go down with them,
who hate what I represent,
the ending of their age,
the birth of something new.
A contest entry
- Your Absolute Best Prewrite by Heavens Child.
800 points, ended April 25, 2008, 48 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Don't Wing A Prayer by Carly Pop.
1000 points, ended May 15, 2008, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Faith by Pisces rainbow.
1200 points, ended May 21, 2008, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I'm glutton for punishment... by Randomly Beautiful.
600 points, ended June 24, 2008, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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Excellent write here
This piece tells me so much and yet We so often forget he also gave us choices to take and prayed we took the right ones .Often the young today state its my destiny to follow in the footsteps of friends and family be it good or bad .But we each have our own minds to do as we please and so often do not seeing the circimstances and the outcomes are of our own doings and to heel will be ours as well .
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very creative and desriptive,
exquisite.
thank you for your entry,
God bless...
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This is absolutely fantastic! I love it. I love the way you brought out the pain and even fear our Lord suffered before He did God's will. Bravo!
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This is a great poem about Jesus. good luck in the contest.
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Excellent
A two part review. Oops, I hit the wrong key.
I had intended to say what a wonderful read.
Thank you for sharing.
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Excelle
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thank you for entering with this fantastic poem.
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Wow... you have expressed this so well. What had to be endured...
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I have often tried to comprehend everything that Jesus went through. This is an incredibly powerful piece, protraying it from his point of view. And I love the hopeful way in which you end off. I am so glad you entered and I got to enjoy this piece.
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Bravo
Such a beautiful portrait of Jesus' last hours. I especially liked how you wrote it in first person.
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This is at once strong and tender, the thoughts on the Mount of Olives shown as so human; while accepting the burden placed on his shoulders, he takes the time to mourn the loss of the beauties of the world, and to wonder /can you not stay awake with me for just a little while?/ Beautifully and sensitively portrayed, the final lines full of quiet impact. I loved this read.
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loved it, loved it, loved it!
That was pure heaven to enjoy!
Well written and smartly done!
the birth of something new.....powerful and mighty
everlasting is the power in this poem!
loved it!
ears/Seattle high five poet!
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Oh wow this is a really inrtiguing write. I realyl enjoyed reading it, and shall probably read it again Nice job, good luck in the contest.
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Wow!
This deserves the gold! Awesome! Wonderful expression-deep thoughts. Keep it up! -
"The olive presses silent,
awaiting the harvest's yield,
just as my father waits for the bitter harvest
I must soon give.
The unforgiving moon hides pale
her face"
This is such a deeply beautiful & spiritually present piece, Poet. Bravo. I have always thought that God favors His Poets; why else would He give us such wondrous gifts??? Wanda
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