bare, brown lawn
last week's fashion
now covered white
busses stranded
schools near empty
spring storm strikes
foot of snow
birds seek feeders
bleak spring outlook
calendar fools
April plays tricks
foot high flurries
Author notes
Three days of snow, heavy winds, a foot of the white stuff. Busses not running - this is Alberta weather - spring weather to boot.
Picture taken by contest host.
A contest entry
- April Snowstorm (Form poetry only) by trista.
1000 points, ended April 27, 2008, 11 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Congrats on the Bronze!
Bear ~ -
Excellent work! You have painted a picture with words. Congratulations on the Bronze.
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Hi Erika,
Gosh, you make me feel like I should be thankful our April storm wasn't any worse than it was!
I agree with Bear (I seem to do that a lot, don't I? lol) you've penned this just beautifully.
If I had to take each section separately I'd say your last verse could use a tad bit more imagery, but putting this all together I thought it worked wonderfully. Great job keeping those filler words out.
This is so different from what I am used to seeing from you in the PO contests...and I'd love to see you incorporate some of this style into those writes!
Thanks so much for a wonderful entry, and good luck to you.
Best wishes,
~J.
*Edited for over-use of the word "wonderful/wonderfully"
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Hi Erika :)
Hey!
I have to say....this is really a great entry!
Loved the use of your words without all the Fillers to hide your thoughts.........as you got right into your artwork and penned it directly to your Reader.....well done~!
The Imagery and Focus is Brilliant!
Title....Loved it!
The Flow is really good even though you used only one punctuation...a comma....and that single comma set the Tone for the rest of this gem of a write.....I am proud of you!
This is really good.......I wish you the best, and may God bless you and your talents,
Brother Bear ~
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See my previous comment in last haiku. This has definitely been an April Fool's for you. Well it will be spring soon enough.
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