Love was not blind
it opened my eyes
to the harsh truth
that is
I don't love you anymore
Absence did not make
my heart grow fonder
it only gave me too much room
to think
to realize
I don't love you anymore
awkwardly
you stood there on my porch
in your torn jeans
and worn out sandels
wilted carnations in your right hand
waiting my arrival
waiting to embrace me
to hear those three sweet words
you've been longing to hear
for three long months
only to hear me say
I don't love you anymore
(Im sorry)
In a list
A contest entry
- Options =] p/w allowed! by LeilaJayne.
700 points, ended May 7, 2008, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - how far?? by onapedestalIstand.
300 points, ended May 6, 2008, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Excellent.
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Very visual
Very visual and dramatic. I loved the picture you painted because it could have been anywhere, anyone which made me feel it was me with those wilted flowers. Brill
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Great opening for this piece, and though a writer friendly subject, I am drawn to the story, and the pace of your writing. I see your poetic voice shaping in this piece. This is fun to come back here and discover!!!
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Oh, my I am embarressed
these poems are so old! I was just a beginner...lol. I am going to go hide in a corner...lol
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Excellent
Interesting and unique take on the old lines "love is blind" and "absence makes the heart grow fonder." How true that the opposite can occur if the betrayal is deep enough, or often enough. It also shows some grace and kindness that you added "I'm sorry" to the bottom, and separated this from the sea of angry, "my pain is all your fault" poems. One question - what does "YELLOW!" mean at the bottom of the poem?
Mark
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Ha Ha! I had to type at the end of my poem my fav color for the contest...they didn't want it in the notes or anywhere else but at the end of the poem so they know that we read the rules...lol. I forgot to erase it...so thanx for reminding me...and thanx for the comments
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I can speak from personal expo. this happens to some of the best ppl/relationships!!=.[ it truly is a sad thing..sarah
ps thanks for entering=P -
"Love was not blind
it opened my eyes"
i like those line's...and i can definitley relate to this poem* it seems when your caught up in the moment you don't pause to take a second & think maybe it's not real love...you don't realize it until you get a little time off to yourself to finally realize the truth- it was mere infatutation*
a great read...
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