Skinny legs, in skinny jeans,
Poster girls for popular teens,
Flipping hair and acting out,
Laughing loud, void of doubt,
But there hiding more than they let on,
The lie, decieve, pretend, and con,
They aren't the girls you think you see,
Looking hot and acting free,
They hide it so well,
You may never know,
They may not let on,
It probably won't show,
But their troubled, and hurt, and dying inside,
Few are there when there troubled,
And few see when they've cried,
People are jealous, but they'll never see,
That she is not who she pretends to be,
Everyone loves her,
But nobody cares,
She's waiting for the angel
Who'll be the answer to her prayers,
Flat taut stomach, tiny waist,
Always watching what they eat, sweets they never taste,
The party starts when they arrive,
'Cuz they're cute as cute can be,
And nobody can set the scene,
Quite like a ED beauty queen.
Author notes
I was reading Perfect by Natasha Friend, and at a certain part, I just said allowed "Oh snap! 'Cuz no one sets the scene like and ED beauty queen." I say dorky stuff like that all the time, and so I ran in her and stuck it in a poem. So yay me.
Now I'm going to finish my book.
A contest entry
- Best Prewrite - with no trophies by background music.
525 points, ended April 21, 2008, 13 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Tired of HM's (X) by PatheticKt.
550 points, ended August 26, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think!!!
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Ok, nice write you got here ^^'
The theme is quite cliche, though but I like how you went in-depth to that with simple words penned here
You may need spellcheck here and there also, maybe the poem should be divided in stanzas- let it loose, let the reader feel the tone in each stanza, you know what I mean?
All in all, not a bad write you got here ~
By the way, what's an ED beauty queen? I think I'm having a blonde moment or something
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aww wow i really like! great poem and nice nice work!
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whoa this is really powerful and 100% true...those "perfect" girls everyone "loves" they really dont care about them as ppl and those girls have to go thru so much to be who they are. good job!
xoxo- christina
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This is definitely a powerful poem that all teenage girls need to read. Though there may be a "popular" crowd that looks like they have it all together, they don't; no one does. You've expressed this very clearly and eloquently. Congrats on the HM.
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yay !
I really liked this poem, and i think that there is alot of un-necessary things going on with young girls trying to starve them-selves to get thin. ! you don't have to starve yourself to get thin. Just eat right and exercise. i've lost 7 pounds so far, but i've been slacking on exercise
. But i'll get back on trsck. anyways, great poem !
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This poem sends a powerful message to teenage girls who's idealisms are ruled by what they see in magazines. It's so true to they are not who they seem in my experience shallow girls like that, obsessed with the way they look, have shallow personalities too, and I agree they are really insecure underneath. (sorry if that sounds stereotypical). 'no one sets the scene like and ED beauty queen ' - could not have said it better myself!
Now just two nit-picks LOL.... I don't feel that poetry needs punctuation at the end of each line, the line break stipulates a break in flow anyways so the commas are irrelevant... and just typo in last line... " a[an] ED Queen"
Still, a great poem!
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Great write
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really nice poem! great job! but in this line "The she is, not who she pretends to be," I think you should change "the" to "that" you don't have to, just an idea! good luck in all of your contests!
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oh, i loved that book.
it definately hit home on a few parts.
but yeahh, this poem was really good.
great job.
and keep writing. :]]
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