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Even Into Death

Hark to me
Ye darken Angel
Take this love
So young and fragile
Keep it safe
Let it grow
So one day it may kiss
Your greatest foe

For my armour
Be dinged and dented
And my sword
Lay dull and bended
My breath be then
Fairly winded
Yet I still give
A gift most splendid

I give you me
Although I be not there
I give you more
Than I could just spare

I give you love my dear
On that love I swear
Of you and your future
I do truely care

For love be much more
Than just matters of bed
I tell you as I told you before
I shadow the path you tread

Then you hear my whispers
The words you hear are as read
"I love you always and forever
    even into death"

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • starblaze
    August 20, 2008

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    Thanks for entering the contest very nice structure and rhythm. I like the way it shows how selfless love can be, and it builds up well to the last line. thanks again!


  • Re-invention silver member
    May 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    aww... so beautiful indeed....loved the way you use the rhyme schemes here very creative.. good luck!


  • forever and ever
    May 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    this was beautiful. i felt as though you were truely here saying that to ME. lol. great write, and i love how you wrote it as in midevil times. very cool.


  • Great Cthulhu
    April 25, 2008

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    The rhythm of this is just stupendous! Well done! In your second line, did you mean: "Ye darkened Angel"? This is an impressive testament to dedication. I enjoyed your vocabulary choices. This is my favorite line: "I shadow the path you tread" - would this be a dark dedication? Keep your pen to the page and thanks for entering!


  • broken-colours
    April 19, 2008

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    This is probably one of the sweetest things I've ever heard. When reading, it feels as though the poem is truly directed at me, and it warmed my heart all over. Excellently penned, plus the rhyme makes it flow wonderfully. Wow. I don't have enough words to describe how amazing I found this poem! Thanks for entering and good luck!

1 - 5 of 5