Cover
Once upon a time
My true love I did find
You came into my life
And made me your wife
Inside
As the years went by
You did nothing but lie
I hope you have a stroke
I'm leaving on a boat
Forever...The End
"Darlin'tlc"
A contest entry
- "Hate" Hallmark cards by badddgirl.
750 points, ended April 27, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Who Needs 'Em???? by TwiztidMaggot.
300 points, ended June 8, 2008, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - You're a heartbreaker by flyingphoenix.
475 points, ended June 11, 2008, 70 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Good write.
I like the way you seperated your poem into three. I must say, stroke/boat felt a little like you were reaching for a rhyme.
A nice poem, though, I like how it ends on a positive note.
Thanks for entering, good luck
Sunny
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wow! just simply utterly wow! best of luck in the contest!
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this is pretty good. the last bit, stroke, boat... kind of seemed like you were trying really hard to find a rhyme. But either way, you did good. Keep it up!! Best of luck in my cotnest.
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Wow
Wow! This piece is really powerful and full of emotion. I particularly like the layout because the single words which stand alone really add to the sense of isolation and also help the poem to flow from one verse to another. I also feel that the change in tone during the second verse is very effective because when you first begin to read you think that the poem is going express love and affection. Well Done.
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wow this is really good to bad they dont make real cards like this cause i sure could send a few out.. good luck in the contest.... nice to met you...
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Forever...The End
Well done my friend! -
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Glad u liked it! This was a fun contest.
I really don't wish a stroke on anyone although at times u really feel that "PO" lol
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