Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

James

gggg

[Lola Emma]

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • BluArtistEyes
    April 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    wow

    This is a heart breaking story and a very good poem lots of heart went into this I can tell. There is a couple typos that I saw 4th line down in first stanza: you have "stod" and I read it as "stood" it fits with context so I guessing that's what ya meant & the next line isn't a big deal caz it still reads fine, but you have "your" & you meant "you're" other than that it's great and I'm sorry for your loss you probably get that a lot, so yeah I know it doesn't help much, I know the feeling of loss there's been a few close people in my life that are gone & it's hard to deal with them not being there. Keep writing you're doing great poetry is about pouring your heart out on paper you seem to be pretty good at it at least from what I read here. oh well just remember reading that too thanks to XxrockxXxgirlxX comment so if this isn't about you then still sorry for whoever's loss it is and wow if it's not about you then you still did a really great job on this.


  • black-tears
    April 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    WOW!!!

    wow, this is soooooo amazing! you kinda silented me, because your poem is so beautiful.... really, it's amazing! keep writing, your really good at it!


  • Toxic Stardust
    April 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    woa!

    That was really good! It's so sad though. Something like that happened to my friend a couple years ago. They didn't get in a fight or anything, but while they were going out, he got in a bad wreck and he died. I haven't had anything like that happen to me yet, and I hope I never have to.
    ~Alicia Lynn


  • i lostmymind
    April 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    WOW!

    i actually have tears running down my cheeks. this was soo good, It felt like it was me. This was amazing!


  • Lsh-x
    April 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh my god.. This is heartbreaking. This really sent shivers down my spine and bought tears to my eyes Lola!

    You have done a fantastic Job.

    AMAZING WRITE!

    Check out my new poems?

    Laura <3


  • Casey23Morgan
    April 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Such a heartbreaking poem but I loved it. Thank you for sharing, I feel your pain through this poem and its amazing.


  • XxrockxXxgirlxX
    April 19, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Wow. I saw on your profile that a good poet is someone who can write about anyone like it's themselves. You definitely did a great job at that here.


    I can kind of relate to this. But I've never lost someone that close to me.I'm curious, is this a true story?


  • XNevermindX
    April 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    ......Amazing, absolutely amazing. So much saddness and emotion in this poem it made me feel like I was going to cry; this is especially true to the last stanza. Amazing, keep it up ^-^

1 - 8 of 8