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The way it may be

The laws that govern all there is are few
But work in ways so hard to comprehend
And everything we have to learn is new,
We cannot yet begin to see the end.

It's clear that matter is not as it seems.
We know the laws that govern everyday.
There is no magic power built from dreams
No ruling mind above us holding sway.

And yet connections can span all of time,
While time itself may not be real at all.
The way it works a mystery sublime.
To probe the answers is our greatest call.

For life itself is just a simple game
And real comprehension is the aim.

Author notes

Reading philosophical sonnets brings you to this!!!

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

1 - 5 of 5
  • ecrivain01 silver member
    April 21

    Edit | Reply

    I'd change ...

    real in the last line to "heart-felt" and it would work and sound better, since the meter would work better. Otherwise, good job on this one.

  • well penned here poet..my favorite rhymer.

    Great job..I will be back to attack this one..or do the Mona Lisa LMAO...

    love ya

    Tory

  • I'm sorry sir, but I don't understand the first two lines, what do you mean by "couched in space" I enjoy the overall message of the piece, but it is ever so slightly clunky around the edges. Maybe a second draft and a thesaurus would benefit this piece. I've noticed a lot of people seem to plump for the time/sublime rhyme too

    • cricketjeff gold member
      April 19
      Edit | Reply
      couched means in this contest expressed and the space I'm referring to is the area of understanding.
      Time sublime is a favourite rhyme because there are a limited number of suitable ones! Notmally for that reason I avoid rhyming time. Unfortunately here the concept of time is quite important to my content.
      If the "couched in space" was not clear to you then to get my message across I need to pick words more carefully. It should always be clear from the context what unfamiliar usages mean. So I've failed

  • Mairi bheag gold member
    April 19
    Edit | Reply
    And why not...

1 - 5 of 5