Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Save Her From The Night

Left alone
Hidden from sight
Protect her from the demons
Save her from the night

Don’t let her alone
Hold her while she sleeps
Safe from the past
Show her what she means

Allow her to
See into your mind
The key lying there
Easy for her to find

Unlock your thoughts
Let her know what you feel
She’ll determine whether
Or not you are real

To figure out the things
That keep her close to you
Figure out maybe
Why you love her too

By: SLD 7/24/03

Author notes


Written July 24th, 2003

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 13 of 13
  • firesprite2283
    March 3, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    GREAT

    wow..AWESOME GIRL!! AWESOME!!!...i dont know what to say except that i totally enjoyed reading this..i think its so important to let those who mean most to you know what you feel and think about them cuz if you dont tell them now you might not have tommorow to tell them..write on!

  • EmberFire
    February 7, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    this poem is great. it flows and rhymes so well. i love your use of words to describe the girl. thanks for the comment on my mirror poem. take care and keep writing,
    .:Ember:.
  • Jacob Thornburg
    January 5, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Nice rhymes.
    I like the first two stanzas.
    The contrast of protectiong her from all the dangers of the night... and keeping her safe.
    Edited on Jan 05, 10:58 because ''.
  • Octoberchild
    January 3, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    this is good, and i really enjoyed it! I like how you've taken words that are generally simple, and used them to tell a vibrant story. thanks for sharing!
  • Just4u
    January 1, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Awesome job...two thumb up...
    Not only good poem, but good advice to boot...

    -Eddy-
  • TimDiVito
    December 20, 2003
    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    Excellent write, with great emotion. Take care Sonya and keep writing. TimDiVito
  • DeadlyMirror
    December 18, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    this is beautiful!
    such great advice, i wish people did this more often.
    i really like your work, you seem to put a lot of thought into your poems. thanx for the comment and keep writing!

  • bolddimples
    December 17, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    There is a vulnerability to this girl that I love. The way she is in need of protection...wow. A few suggestions though...
    "Easy fro her to find"- fro?
    "Or not you are for real"- I would take out the for.
    "That keeps her close to you"- I would say that keep her close to you. These are just my opinion, feel free to take it, or to not take it. Beautiful poem regarless.
  • Jenn Lynn
    December 14, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Wow, so well written an beautiful, you are full of so much talent and wonder its amazing! It flows wonderfully...I loved it!
    Love Always, ~*Jemmy

  • Lyra
    December 14, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Very flowing indeed, but I wonder who "she" is?
    Perhaps mother earth, or maybe just speaking of yourself to a love?
  • FromTheAshes
    December 14, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    wow this ones so beautiful! and the ryming and flows perfect! last stanzas my favourite. thank you for your lovely comment, your too sweet! absolutey loved this one ~anya~

  • yumanbeing
    December 13, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    a somber tenderness - seems personal/specific as the need for protection from past memories but at the same time a great emphasis on the beauty of the simple action of understanding -
  • Joker666
    December 13, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    This really, it got my attention and keep it, the word demons usual makes me pay attention lol. these are really good. thanx for shareing. keep on keepin on ~dirk~
1 - 13 of 13