she blinked at the ceiling,
watching as the stars go off and on;
batted her eyelashes at
curved architecture
and moved her body to mimick.
he pressed warmth at numb back,
frostbite melted from winter landscape...
rolled over, making 'snow angels'
arcing like the roof...
[held up by lies
and midnight promises]
he struck the match, just raised it too high
and, pops and supports snapped,
left barren as
the roof collapsed.
~~~
Author notes
bon cassandra (formerly rockerchkpoet)
Prompt: arcade
ar·cade /ɑrˈkeɪd/ noun, verb, -cad·ed, -cad·ing.
–noun 1. Architecture. a. a series of arches supported on piers or columns.
b. an arched, roofed-in gallery. Compare colonnade.
A contest entry
- project poetry season one [first round] by blackday.
600 points, ended April 23, 2008, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
...
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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You dear are becoming breathakingly awesome in every aspect of poetry. You are really something!!!!!!!
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In general, I liked this poem. You had a good concept, but you fell a bit short in the middle of the second stanza, leading to the last few lines. It was... it didn't flow right in my mind? The images just weren't picked as well as I would have hoped.
I just didn't get the match thing? I mean, I do & the title, but I guess there wasn't enough there for me to really get a taste of that message?
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the title is okay. i thought it was corny at first, then again, allusion-wise it works ? ah, whatever.
i like this though. good luck.
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I like the different interpretations this poem allows me, Cassie - so many images and emotions you've planted inside my mind/heart here. Fire and warmth is good, it's what we need but such a pity when the fire burns itself grey...
You are a talented one and this poem displays your talent so very well!
~ Nicolette
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Thank you so much!
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I like your descriptions.... (as I always do...) They are very vivid.... And play like a film strip in your head.
Hm... You would be a very good novelist
Perhaps you should give it a try
Anywho. Lovely write
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To be honest, I was a novelist before I wrote poetry. I wrote stories and 'books' since I can remember. Then I got into poetry and found more success in that.
I guess all of my imagery comes from when I wrote stories.
Thank you for the comment!
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well done sweetheart
good luk in this
love you -
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