Enameled emotions,
coloring of nails,
befit the moods or outfits
of royalty itself.
Adobe rusts, taupe and ecru,
tones of the earth,
are donned for casual class
on safaric outings.
Radiant reds, passionate pinks,
set the scenes
for romantic evenings,
of magical memories.
Cool-tone teals,
azures of ambrosia,
brilliant blues
of oceanic dreams,
make up colors
of unlimited illusions.
Glittering gold,
shimmering silvers,
iridescence sheens
for elegant evenings,
claim a touch of wealth.
Imagination’s deceptions
lacquered on fingernails
will fade and crack
with daily activity .
Author notes
POW contest entry
Theme: Nail polish and the infinite number of colors to suit moods and outfits. Also, I think maybe, a deeper glimpse into life and how we change our ‘coloring’ to fit in or adapt, or even voice our own individual personalities.
Wanted to use the phrase ‘safaric outings’, but Word Doc wouldn’t show me that ‘safaric’ was a ‘legal’ word….anyone know?
Do you have any idea how many times I had to re-write those ‘2’ lines in the last ½ hr.??????…LOL…LOL
Edited 4.21.08 - changed the title back to 'Enameled Emotions' (from 'Illusions of Imagination') and added MY word 'safaric'....lol
A contest entry
- Poem of the Week - POW by Arkbear.
1000 points, ended April 21, 2008, 9 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Wow! This is great. I enjoyed reading this. You are a talented writer. Keep up the great writing.
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Thank you so much 'Tasha..'...pleased you enjoyed it. I had a rough time with the rules on this contest...lol....but not as bad as the last contest - that one I edited about 9 times!!!...LOL
blessings
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amazing metaphores of nail polish and all it can represent. I love the last stanza most. Kind of like everything fades with time.
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Thank you so much 'crazymomma' for stopping in to read one of my writes - I truly appreciate it.
I am pleased that you enjoyed this.
blessings
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You took a little idea
and painted the nails right off of it. Your word choice is quite descriptive. Good consonace and metaphor throughout.
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Thank you Amazira! These PO contests are hard - have to have a 'unique' theme, then there's rules and a line limit! I'm not sure what consonance and metaphors exactly are - I just write my thoughts...lol...so if I did something right - that's great! Appreciate your lovely comment.
blessings
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Love the wording in this. Excellent job done here. Nice flow and rhyme Congrats on the Hm in the pow.
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Thank you so much 'RedwingSpirit' for reading, the lovely comment and the clappies on 'enameled emotions'. I am pleased you enjoyed this.
blessings
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I know I commented on this before the contest, love it! And so did the judges. Congratulations on the HM!
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Thanks Neon!!
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Wow! Great write!! I love that different colours can relate to different moods or emotions... I wear colours for that reason too!
LOL Oi Poppa... I bet guys would use that false advertising if they could hehehe...
I agree... some of the clothing these days.. seesh! lol
Great write!
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Thank you so much 'kiwi'....glad you enjoyed this.
Poor 'poppa'....I nailed him on that comment...
...I unmercifily (sp?..lol) am picking on him now...LOL
blessings
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Another wonderful write hun....
but arent all ladies glossing over the truth hehe I mean , isnt all make up false advertising 
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Thanks!
Yup, we're 'glossing over' chips, cracks and all...LOL...
and I think some of the clothing I see is DEFINITELY false advertising - honestly, with those outfits do you even NOTICE if they have on nail polish/make-up or not??!!!
blessings
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ahhh congrats on your hm! this piece is absolutely brillant! Hopefully, I will be reading more of you in the future. I truly enjoyed this piece
Mel
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Thank you so much 'luckynsincere' for reading, the wonderful comment and the applause on "Illusions...". I am so pleased you enjoyed this.
I enjoyed your write also, and hope to read more of you.
blessings
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Wow, what fantastic words! love the theme and imagery, "cool - tone teals", brilliant. Well done and good luck!
Alex.
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Thank you so much Alex for your wonderful comment and clappies. I appreciate it and am pleased you enjoyed this. It took the 'last' HM.......a lot of unusual writes this week. I liked this and I really liked my entry for last week - but it also only took an HM.....think I need a break from the PO's....lol
blessings
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Good write here
I know the speeling help truly is the worst on here I think they could make it better
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Thank you 'storiesuntold' for reading, your comment and clappies on 'Illusions..'. Appreciate it and am pleased you enjoyed this.
I have never typed anything on here, so know nothing about AP's spell check. I have always typed everything in my Word Doc, then copied/pasted to here. But I made-up the word 'safaric'......and Word Doc let me know....lol...
best wishes
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Amazing how much attention a single word can generate, isn't it? lol Now to me...that just goes to show how important EVERY word in a poem is. (Or should be!) I like "safaric" and I wanted so badly to tell you to use it before we started judging.
I'm glad to see from your notes below that you plan to change it when the PO is finished up though. 
It's called "poetic license", and there's nothing wrong with experimenting or making up a word when needed. 
Okay, as for the rest. I agree with Bear, there is lots of show but not much tell. I'd like to see some reason a bit more obvious pointed out as to why this is all important, or to make that connection a bit more solid to the comparison of how people "change their colors". You have a great idea for the central metaphor, so don't be afraid to toy with that, introduce it earlier into the poem maybe. Keep in mind too, nouns and verbs are where most of your power is going to come from. Too many adjectives (and this has just a few too many, IMO) tend to dilute the subject(s) they describe. That balance of show and tell can be tricky, and while I'd rather see it lean toward the show side as this does, rather than too much tell, both are still important.
I can't really see anything else to critique...Oh - I'm not crazy about the title choice, but not bad. Again, I think working with the metaphor might have given you some additional ways to go with the title.
Thanks so much for joining us again, and bringing such a unique themed write. You have a knack for finding creative subjects to write about, really making me curious what you could do with a tired and cliché subject to inject new life into it. Maybe one of these times we'll find out?
Good luck and best wishes as always,
~J. -
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Nice review Julie :)
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TY Bear.
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Thank you so much 'trista' for the time you put in on reading and judging this. I appreciate it.
I am glad you like my new word...lol.......funny sometimes what the fingers type when the mind is running...hahaha
yes, I realize I need to learn the trick of balancing show and tell....I will have to read more on that and practice, practice, practice.
I was thinking about changing my title to 'Enameled Emotions'....do you feel that would be a good choice? Or maybe just 'Enameled'.?
I'm afraid my trying a tired and cliche' write for a PO would come out sounding tired and cliche'..
thanks again
blessings -
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I love "Enameled Emotions"!
Hehe...if you really believe you'd sound "tired and cliche" writing on a more common theme, I think that will have to be my personal challenge to you. Give it a shot, see what you can do. You don't have to enter it in a PO contest...but send me a link if you decide to take me up on it.
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ok 'Enameled Emotions' it will be (again, lol, as that was my original title) and I will be editing MY word into it...lol
Give me a few 'prompts' for a cliche poem and I'll give it a try...
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I like Enameled Emotions!
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lol - THAT was my original title.......I guess I am trying to over-guess myself on coming up with a title you won't 'squash' as being common....lol
I am going to change it back to that, after contest done, and also add MY word....lol
thanks
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Hi boomer :)
I went around and around with that word, *safaric*.....and then I saw that you changed it to safaris......but actually, I think it should just be....*safari*.......as you are using it in a personal tense.....and the letter *a* should precede safari.........what do you think?
....either way, no deduction there, just wanted to discuss my thoughts about it :)
OK.....incredible Theme!
LOVED the way you dug for something deeper than ordinary stuff........your use of imagery is fantastic ~
However........your balance of *show & tell* are way off IMO.....I feel that you showed plenty....but told not as much ~
Check out each stanza....and look at the number of adjectives you have used...........see what I mean about *showing*, vs. *telling*?
Ok......your Power is lacking.....your Impact is not bad, but not momentous as I would have liked to see......your Focus is spot-on.......and your Lasting Impression is going to be hurt because of the other areas I just mentioned......
........not much else to critique here.....nice flow......great Imagery, but no Aha moment and I believe this could have really scored BIG points had you thrown in some reasons WHY all of this should, could, did, or does affect a person ~
Let's get it on the scoreboard....
....good luck my friend and God bless,
Bear ~
Title 9.6
Flow 9.8
Depth 8.4....lots of depth for Show*....but not a lot of depth for Tell*
Theme 9.95
Feelings 8.35....as I mentioned 3 lines up ~
Grammar 9.45....same as above ~
Presentation 9.8
Uncommonness 10
Sit & Ponder Affect 9.15
Ability to follow Rules 10
Bears Score: 94.5
Not bad....but it could have been a lot higher :( ....but still, not bad :)
No editing ~
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Thank you Bear for your time in critiquing this.
('safaric' - just the word I typed and liked...lol...safari would be correct, but I think I'll ignore that and use 'my' word later.......only because I like it...hahaha)
I was afraid you'd say I "told" more than I "showed", so was surprised on that - guess I don't have a good handle on the difference - something (else) I need to work on. *smile*
Knew my 'power' was short - thought about spilling all those colors on a white carpet..., but decided against it. Mainly, on this, I guess I was trying to tell just about the polish and how many colors, not how it really affected people - but that's a good idea for me to use another time (not on a PO)..
Thanks for the nice score and judging.
blessings
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I much enjoyed the simplicity of this, as a professional artist I rely much on a feeling for colour and I think your observations and description shows much sensitivity. I like the way you've pointed at the 'dressing' of it all as well... 'Enameled emotions,' sums up loads in just two words. Great write! Good luck to you, Sol
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Thank you so much 'Sol' for your lovely comment and clappies. Am pleased you enjoyed this. I paint landscapes, when the 'mood strikes', and love blending all the colors to create new.
best wishes
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Very unusual theme you chose here - do not wear nail polish often so do not think of this very much either. Have to admit there sure are some strange colors these days. Interesting to read.
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Thank you 'grannyeri' - glad you found this interesting. I use nail polish, and change and mix my own colors, because it adds strength to my nails and they don't break as often. And I've seen some really wild colors in the stores! Just haven't tried them all yet...
blessings
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What a wonderful piece, this is great hunni I love the theme, so creative. I also love the word ‘safaric' although it didn't appear in the dictionary I use either, but then neither does half the English language
A gorgeous write with a fab flow to it. Good luck hun
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Thank you so much 'LadyD' for your wonderful comment and clappies. appreciate it and am pleased you enjoyed this. I like my made-up word...lol...will change this later and insert "my" word......yup, I think we need to rewrite that dictionary! (can we add 'e's????? )
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You want to check the un-word dictionary on-line They have words that have been made up but now actually have meaning (like fabtastic; meaning fabulous and fantastic) I got a few words from there that I use now..lol.
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un-dictionary? Hmmm, sounds very interesting - I will have to check it out sometime.
thanks
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well then...although i am fond of a pedicure every now and then(usually before basketball season)i happen to have the biggest toes in the world...that being said(as if this is a support group,lol)i loved your distinct wording of all of the colors...i once made up a word, but then someone stole it...'microsoft'
shouldnt i get paid?
lol
well done
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Thank you so much 'Ryan..' - glad you enjoyed this. Do you do wild colors for your pedicures?..
I like my made-up word! It just typed that way and I liked it! Will change this later and add "my" word...lol.... (and I 'made up' some of my distinct wording for the colors, too....)
Yes - you DEFINATELY should be paid for your 'microsoft' word....lol...lol
best wishes
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You should hook up with my granddaughter! She will paint your nails colors that are as of yet unknown!!! This was too fun to read! Best of luck!
Az
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Thank you so much Az - I am pleased you enjoyed 'Illusions...'. Would love to meet your grand-daughter and have her paint my nails - would be great fun!! I mix colors sometimes and come up with some really cool shades that strangers will ask me where I got that color!....lol
blessings
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What a marvelous theme you chose! Wish I had thought of it..** I think safaric is a grand word, and you know..if a word gets used enough, it becomes legal.. Good luck in the contest.
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Thank you so much 'NeonRose' for reading, the wonderful comment and clappies. I appreciate it and am pleased you enjoyed this.
I just typed that word - really liked it, too...lol....but Word Doc wouldn't accept it.......I may use it anyways...hahaha.
blessings
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Don't ya love it? I once made up my own word...
and got away with it....I like Safaric....
Another well penned entry! Best wishes in the contest.
Write on!
*PEACE*
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Thank you so much 'islekine'.! It was just the word I typed, then looked at it, Word Doc said "NO"...lol...I may change it anyways!..
best wishes to you also.
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