Thats all that you do to you to lines to you to you to you to you to lines in the fountian to lines in the sea to lines in the mountian to lines in the meaniin sea to late till you tell me to late till you see to lines in the mountian to lines in the see to lands in the sand in to lands in the sea to lands in the sand in my tee seven tee tree to lions in the fountian to lines in the see to lines in the fountian my tee seven tee tree if you could could you see my tee my tee my tee seven tee tree. To lines in the fountian to lines in the tree. To lines in the tee are nine to lines in the tree are nine to lines in the tree are nine and im in nine tee seven tee tree. To late to lips to late till you see to lines in the mountian to lines in the sea now telleein telleein telleein i n tee in i n tee in i n tee in i n tee in tie in to seven tee tree:
Author notes
To lines in the see in
A contest entry
- small words that count more than the whole world by Dienush.
4300 points, ended April 29, 2008, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
the last couple of lines were confusing for me, but that doesn't necessarily mean anything since I am often confused by a lot of the poetry I read here at AP.
thanks for entering the contest.
-
Okay, I must say, unless by this piece you mean to tell someone that they are not seeing something, I'm not sure how this fits the contest even remotely, but I find it original. The repetition works, but till the end it's a bit overdone. I really like the idea I got out of it, about reading lines from the sand and the sea too late, very interesting and poetic. I only really wish there were some line breaks and less misspellings, so I could better comprehend your poem as intended. I think this is something I'd enjoy a lot if not for the above stated issues, so if you revise it please do let me know to read it again. Thank you for entering.
~Diana
Adding your comment:
