Doldrum routines, harsh bleak reality
Mournful cries, moans deep in the spirit
Nightmares repeating impending dooms
Dismal heart, a suffocating soul
Climactic desires, blazing rays of hope
Bonding love, sensuous shrills freed
Visions everlasting, Passions consume
Reassured spirit, new fire ignited
A contest entry
- Opposites by Darkwell.
450 points, ended July 20, 2008, 11 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ~Give me your BEST Prewrites~ by Bean Sidhe.
1000 points, ended November 14, 2008, 46 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Green To Gold- Enter HM Winning Poems Only by Mercury Rising.
700 points, ended May 12, 10 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Best of the Best!! by DramaQueen469.
2000 points, ended June 8, 37 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Convert your Bronze to Gold by BearWoman.
1500 points, ended June 24, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - To Be Put On My Favorites List by Ted E Bare.
400 points, ended October 15, 249 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - Anything && Everything. by Antebellum.
600 points, ended July 20, 177 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrites. by Antebellum.
400 points, ended November 14, 201 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 33 of 33
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my favorite part of this is the second stanza.
I really like the way youve worded this as well. thanks for entering. good luck -
amazing imagery.
thanks for entering.
good luck -
I can see the reason why this one has already picked up some hardware for your mantle. In so few words you made such an impact in the emotional department. Impressive with the tip of the pen with this gem. I want to thank you for your entry into the following contest: "To Be Put On My Favorites List."
Ted E
PS: Your entry has been blessed by the three wise clappers, but don't spend the whole nine points in one place(lol)!
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A nice short write. I like the contrasting flavor and focuses of the two stanzas. Thank you for your entry.
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no.
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Wow, beautiful imagery and emotion... your vocabulary enhances an amazing write
Thankyou so much for entering, and I wish you the best of luck
Maria
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You haven't wasted one word in this excellent poem. Your vocabulary and word placement are really good, and your poem was a pleasure to read. Best of luck, and thanks for entering.
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Makes me think of the two parts of my day.
Being aborted from my sleep, and then lucid (toxic)feeling just before im laid to rest (back to sleep that is).
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This seems a bit choppy for my liking & somehow, I'm not certain of the message you were trying to communicate to your readers. But, I do like the language and the word usage is expressive.
Thank you for your entry. -
I hope that I don't ever have to go through that...
verry nice write.. Your friend in Poetry... JackReed3...
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Cool , i say kewl
Diametric eh... nice way of completing that task, well done!!!
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you have such a painters pen with words that flow like colors the poem started in blues and end in reds
thats not easy
just wow WTG! Good luck in the contest -
you know, i crnt make my mind up on wat to say, thats good, coz u making me think lolall your poem are so powerful its unbelieveable, u go girl!
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This seems like a sine wave of emotions that abound the summits in each direction, to speed up the recovery of what is different each time of change. Sounds like a making it up event. nice try!
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Feeling
This seems to be a list of the deepest darkest and most intense feelings that you have. 100% from the heart and that is what poetry is all about. 8.5/10. -
A lot of hope.
The first two lines remind me of what I went through & still go through. Very painful, but a lot of hope conveyed in the end. Superb.
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Great Job
I liked your vocabulary. It was very pituresque. Keep up the good work.
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Touching
I loved reading this poem.
It's worded beautifully and deep.
Keep up the amazing work.
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I'm not too big a fan of this style, seperate following sentences, kind of adds a mechanical feel to the writing and in my opinion makes it less human to read, although the stark contrast between that goes well when you look at both stanzas, the first being overly melodramatic and dire, while the second a little more hopeful, albeit still restrained. All in all it sports a few good interpretive messages such as the "bleak reality" we suffer through may only be temporary while hope still resides in the individual heart. good message, so so form
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Very,Very nice. truthful yet beautiful.
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very different but i like this a lot...very good job on it
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You got mail..
You got Fan Mail.
P.S. I didn't read this.
Ha.
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DEEP
so many words that mean alot of things. I feel like in a way it may describe you? but if not...its still very touching...deep -
bananas
It is very good, great words and how you describe the differences in emotions as if you cut a line throw someone and halfed them with a class.
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short but very good...
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this is certainly different but i get what you are saying and good write
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Incredible
Wow am I that transparent? lol Your words suffocating soul really touched me. You explain emotions very well. Thank you for this write
LDG 626
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wow
the imagery is wonderful
such an invigorating write
so erratic and raw
also iviting to a number of feelings
very very well done great job
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Um.
Thats so...powerful-ish. Its really....idk the word for it.But...great job.
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we should make love
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hmm...
interesting. I have never read anything like that before. Very nice.
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hey sis this is great like born said the two emotions are good togther i love it
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as Expected
Anya, first thing that has to be said is well done, i think you have managed to capture in free verse two opposing emotions, and captured them very well, what is interesting is that reading this i tbink that a lot of bi polar people may relate to it, the two opposing emotional states in which they exist. stunning job and well done young jedi
Michael
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