Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Knocked Up (You're a Daisy if You Do)


his gentle kiss

erased

the hard knocks

before him

and I stopped breathing

as a dandelion

and started blooming

like a daisy

in the eternal spring

of becoming a

Mama














Author notes

Prompt is: "The Day I Stopped Breathing"
30 words

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Ithica silver member
    April 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You just write the most beautiful poetry!!! Now there are 8 of us sighing... Congrats. on that Golden Goblet...


  • Cannonsfire
    April 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    *sigh...and such a beautiful daisy Love, C


  • Androgyneric
    April 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Simplistic and beautiful.


  • Grey Mouser
    April 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Excellently done. Fantastic imagery capturing the reader in your words. The first bloom of motherhood is a magical moment. Best to you.

    Mouser


  • mysticstorm gold member
    April 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    How wonderful gorgeous...what a beautiful take on the prompt...such wonderful creativity and so true for the moment you find out a child is now a part of you...excellent and tender...beautiful meataphor and imagery...well done...
    thank you for entering!


  • paulcreates silver member
    April 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Well, this is a positive take on the prompt. Very unique take on the prompt.
    "...started blooming

    like a daisy..."



    Paul


  • sheltered
    April 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Very outside the box if you will.


  • Manda Kathryn Greeters member
    April 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Wow
    Gorgeous

1 - 8 of 8