He washes his hands in mud
Cleans his skin in sand
she beckons him from dirty sheets
tear-stained with outstretched hands
half of her heart in each
Like an offering of fruits
like a prayer to a god
She would give him everything
but he washes away her scent with filth.
Author notes
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Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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"she beckons him from dirty sheets
tear-stained with outstretched hands"
The title to the poem really aids in helping understand the general idea. I enjoyed reading this. Your word choice keeps the reader interested and the length is short yet sweet. Great job; keep writing!
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interesting i really loved the beginning ^^
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Hmm... The descriptions are very interesting.... Very good imagery, however... I like the flow - it was wonderful, in places ~
Good poem
~ Perception -
I like it.
Sorry I can't say more than that.
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Thanks for letting me read your "dumb poem".
It's not too bad... Ok, Ok! It is dumb.
(I was joking.) My favorite type of poem is when it rhymes, but this wasn't "dumb". I don't really understand what this poem says. But when I read the title it sorta, kinda, might make sense. Good job! If you make poetry, it not "dumb". At least you made a poem. I'll see if you have any more "dumb" stuff. 
-Beyond Da` (Awsome) Craziness
Trust me with my nickname.


1 - 5 of 5





