I locked my door
You picked my lock
I shut you off
But you came right back
You infiltrated my dream
You intruded my head
I tried to forget
Tried to pretend that you were dead!!
Im filled with anger now
You make me hate
Cant be close friends with anyone
Ive been hurt too much, for me its too late
Why do you keep bothering me?
In the dream you were crying!! Crying for me!!!
I laughed in your face
Turned away
Felt so good
You asked me why
Why I wrote that poem
Because your a bitch!!!
You killed me inside!
Hurt me bad
A spiral of emotions inside
In the end Im just sad
You dont want to admitt that your guilty do you?
Thats why you dont call!
You know that it was wrong to just stop!!!
I hope this guilt stays with you all your life
I hope it kills you
Kills you
Kills you
Kills you!!!
I sound physco right now
Ha Im just venting!!
Do you feel it?
All my pain
All my anger
All my rage
All my sadness
All my thoughts
My thoughts
My thoughts
The thoughts of death
No not because of you
Your not worth my death
Your not worth a tear
Your not worth a penny
Not even the attention of my ear
Now I mean it this time
Im fully through
Im not thinking anymore
Thinking of you
Congradulations!!
You have the honor of being the one person who I wrote on and on about in this poem
This isnt even my style!!
Barely rhyming
I hope you feel special
Oh very special Crystal or shall I say Memiru or Kemiko or Sam
Ha burn in hell with all your damn nicknames!!!
Im shedding mines
They remind me of you
The fake
The backstabber
The liar
Im done now
My feelings are all let out
Goodbye forever
Enjoy your petty life
I hope not to see you EVER!!!
Author notes
Just getting my final feelings on my ex-bbf out. Not my typical style and far longer than any of my other poems. Probably the deepest. Im not physco if thats what you think...
A contest entry
- Friendship by brightsmylesxx.
700 points, ended April 17, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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Ok, how is it *you* saw fit to criticise hiraeth's poetry? As far as I can ascertain (from your thoroughly amateuristic prose), you're incapable of even comprehending it.
www.livejournal.com is a better setting for this "piece".
I'm going to give you my 3 free applause for 'effort'.
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I dont have to give any resaons for my actions.I do what I please.Heh it was only a matter of time before some of her little friends came after me.Ha w/e its not gonna stop me.
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Well, that was lacerating. You don't even bother to type "whatever", but you're trying to be a linguist.
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Hm sure? If I dont feel like typing the word then I just dont feel like it.Its not like I want to specialize in english.Writing is a hobby for me.Ill let you know when I want to make it my profession so then you can rant on about how my writing is.
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"Its not like I want to specialize in english."
Seriously? Then why call yourself a writer; why call your journal entries poems?
"Ill let you know when I want to make it my profession so then you can rant on about how my writing is."
You don't need to make it your profession - it certainly isn't mine - but it looks to me like you've confused 'poetry' (art) with 'unbridled teenage angst' (ugly and plain). I bet you don't even edit. A poet tries to use clever words in clever ways to paint a picture. 'Ranters' just say what they're 'feeling' and think it qualifies as art. -
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I call them poems because they are.Just because I dont want to specialize in english that doesnt mean I cant write something.A poet can write anyway he/she pleases.I write my way and you write your way.You dont have to like the way I write because I could care less what some stranger says.I say what I want and comment what I want and I dont care what you think a poet is or 'real' poetry is.I dont edit unless I feel there is a mistake.I dont feel like theres anything wrong with my poetry so I usually keep it how it is.You have one definition of art and I have another.I doubt that you will quit your petty ass talk about what I say but just to let you know, I take bullshit from no one and I dont care if your older or more 'experienced' I will still speak my mind.Now just like I do with all the bitches I encounter and dislike, I will say this.Farewell and good day to you.
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I really liked it. I can relate a lot to this kinda thing... lol I hope everything goes alright.If you need to talk I'll talk to yeah ^_^
~Salence
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i DoNt ThInK dIs PoEm WaS bOuT GrAmMeR pErFeCtIoN oR a PeRfEcT fLoW bUt AbOuT gETTiN Ur AngEr EmOtIoNs N fEeLiNs Out!!I lUvD iT!!uR a ReAlY aWsUm PoEt!!i LuV eVerY tHiNg Of UrS i ReAd!!Im AdDiCtEd 2Ur WoRk LyK cRaCkHeAdS aDdIcTeD 2cRaCk!!LoLz!!
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Lolz yeah. I was just trying to get all my anger out. Sucks that I didnt win in the contest but there will be more.
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great vent of your anger. Sometimes the best way to let out your anger is to write about it. This is a great show of emotion, and although there are some grammatical errors and the flow isn't perfect, you captured the feeling of anger well in this poem. Thanks for entering in my contest and good luck.
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Lol yeah.Im not that crazy <.<. Psht, I wouldnt kill anyone. -
VERY BRILLANT...i love your use of repeating words...even if this isnt your typical style is really good! I liked it alot and how you can make it seem so bloody real...sorry i use the word bloody alot...but you seem to capture true emotion in this and its almost to make me cry...lol...and thats saying something considering i dont cry much!
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Ohhh more clappy hands!! Oh yeah my emotion really comes out in my writing. But not so much in real life.
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that- was awesome. great job. really, i mean, that, just, well i can't explain it...i give you many clappy hands.
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Haha, lol. Meh loves clappy hands....and marshmellows!
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wow this is good showing ur emotion
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Thanks, feels good to let it all out.
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I don't think your a physco!!!
I love da way you put all ur emotions into this awesome poem..U can tell it came from ur heart(<3)!
Good Job^^ -
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Thanks! Yeah, I went through like one emotion to another lol. Kinda weird but it feels good!
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ha i loved this!!!!! great way to get your emotions out i dont think your phycho =]
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Ha thanks and I just noticed some mistakes in my spelling. Gots to fix that!
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