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~ Silence ~
Just before daybreak
when the air is coldest and
the wind barely whispers
in the trees outside.
Without opening my eyes
I feel you close to me
warm and safe
here I lie…
With you in my arms thinking about…
~ Silence ~
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Author notes
contest write for "what happens in the white spaces"
Contest write for "Grammy Awards" - Option 2... in some one's arms.
In a list
A contest entry
- what happens in the white spaces by Dienush.
750 points, ended April 30, 2008, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - GRAMMY AWARDS by Rebekah-Ann.
500 points, ended April 25, 2008, 8 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Grammy Awards for HM winners by Rebekah-Ann.
450 points, ended May 2, 2008, 7 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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I love that Place
Between waking and sleeping. Peace. I especially liked the part in your poem where you said warm and safe - you put it right after 'i feel you' (as though your companion is warm and safe) and right before 'here i lie' - you are both safe in each other. What a peaceful feeling, you described it so sweetly. ...thank you...
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this could easily have won Gold. I absolutely loved your poem. Thank you for your entry love!!!
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Isn't that just so lovely that feeling of lying in someone's arms and silence surrounds you but it is comforting.
THis is beautiful!
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I really like this poem. it's simple but has true meaning to it. very well written, great job
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GREAT POEM!!
oh so romantic! I love this and I also love the picture this poem left in my mind. Thank you very much for entering my contest!
My favorite line was:
"Without opening my eyes
I feel you close to me"
Somehow it's a security that I am longing for! GREAT POEM!!
All the best
Becks -
Ohhhhh......I love this!!! Actually kind of had an eerie quality to it!!!! Very beautifully written and my favorite time of the day is that moment of day break when all is silent and I know that I am awakening in the arms of my love!! Well versed dear poet and best of luck!
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I like the atmosphere of this piece. It's full of love and warm, in spite of the cold winds. Thanks for your entry.
~Diana -
sweeet!
this is an amazin wee write i really like it, nice one yet again mucks! domz
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i like your take on the prompt, framing the piece between the two "silences" works well with the idea of "white spaces." it capture the feeling of drifting in and out of sleep very well!
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Awww... and it's really good :-) I like the contrast between outside/inside, warm/cold, and it works really well with the format. I think "silence" was the perfect word to start and end with- it gives the poem definition.
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