I can hear them...
Can you???
You can't hear them?
They call to me as if needing my help.
When I show they only laugh then silence.
I see a pool of water and nothing else,
this feeling of foreboding will not pass.
Can you help them, No you cannot.
No matter how they cry and beg they will only bring you down.
SSSHHH.......
They're here.
Author notes
yet another of my pschizophrenic writings. Hope you enjoy it. Of course I do have to give credit to the very inspirational writings of T.S. Elliot
A contest entry
- Quote Inspired, Keep It Short And Sweet by Exodus.
525 points, ended April 20, 2008, 5 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Don't know about pshizophrenic
but it does give one a chill, Felt like those random times when the dark just spooks the hell out of you
well done,
And thanks for sharing.
Frozentearz -
Wowzers!!
Now this piece brought forth some images
Love the comment in the AC
I can hear them...
Can you???
You can't hear them?
Now these lines grabbed!
Powerful message...
Thank You for sharing Your Voice and Spirit~
Many blessings to You in the contest Sweet Soul
Best wishes too
and much love~ Desire~*~
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Personally I think this was a little heavy on the pronouns. Let the writing speak for itself without having to rely on putting the reader in the piece. I hope I'm making sense
Nevertheless it was a wonderful take on the prompt, thank you
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Yes I hear hear them
and there telling me this poem is incrdible! ^^ Great Job I love it.
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yep, I have had that experience---very scary and unsettling but disolved through consultation and for some medication--me, two out of two
Joe
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x
I like it x
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Thanks its not my usual though
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