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When Apologies Aren't Enough

Tears streaming down
as shoulders gently shake.
Eyes that were once blue
are now drowning in shallow
watered tears.

Tis the mist of a New Moon.
Tis the start of a new day.

I realized when you didn't forgive me
that I really was too good for you.
Maybe I was too much for you to handle,
but let me break it down easy for you;
I am no fool.
So what if I'm deep,
insecure
and troubled?
So what if I have feelings
and emotions
that at times may not be so sturdy?

Tis not my fault what life has in store
For me.
I now blame you for being shallow
and guilting me so.
You don't know the first thing about me -
Thanks for letting me go.

Author notes

For a contest

Everyone is worth more than they think they are.

And a lot of guys (no offense if you are one) are not deep thinkers and therefore become frustrated and even intimidated by girls like myself. Fun stuff.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Shadow Stalker
    April 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I really like this poem as I can really relate to it when referring to the first guy I fell in love with. Thanks for sharing.

    ~Kisses & Roses


  • luna-midnight gold member
    April 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    lol. nice and different take on the prompt..lol. and no im deff not a guy..lol. girls like urself, which are? lol

    i suppose everyone is..sigh
    thanks for your entry and good luck
    take care
    stephanie


  • PrabhuDayal Khattar silver member
    April 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Indeed a touching piece you have brought here with tearful words yet very definate but with the feel of the sorrow is seen here in the words..well done...


  • ModernXTimes
    April 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You like this background don't you?

    I liked it. Very powerful as usual. Your emotions always shine right through the type and always are able to make an impact. This one's no different. I love the end.
    "You don't know the first thing about me -
    Thanks for letting me go."

    I think the only problem I had with the poem was the transition from the first part to the second part, you know "Tears streaming down..." to "Tis the mist of a New Moon." I feel that they are two COMPLETELY different thoughts and they really need to be either separated or need another statement in there to connect them. That way your poem flows better. How about you put the "tis" lines in their own stanza? just a thought.

    Keep up the great work. Love you!

    ~Carli~

1 - 6 of 6