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What I've Made Of This

A bleak and desolate isle
From which I do not deviate

I listen to crunches beneath my feet
Of leaf and banch, these deadened pieces
Wind rushes through the trees

Trees that tower above me in eternal age
Casting ancient shadows across the land

The light is faint, but I can see

I decided to walk this path alone
And I have made it my own

A contest entry

What do you think?

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • SingPraiz4Hym
    April 28, 2008

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    Reminds me so much of my teen years when I felt I was walking alone. I feel what was written here quite well. Good job!

  • A Deer Eye
    April 20, 2008

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    This poem sets a very sad, lonely, even eerie atmosphere. I like the description in it - it creates good imagery. Great poem!


    • Eternally Fallen
      April 21, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks, that was kind of what I wanted to do with the piece, and it kind of reminds me of life in general, not just the picture prompt.


  • jinsays gold member
    April 13, 2008

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    Aww....I guess you didn't see it. Too bad. Thanks just the same, this was a great poem.
    Peace,
    Jin

  • William T. Masonis
    April 13, 2008

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    Decent Enough

    First impression was that this would be deeply introspective. Turned out not quite the case, but the atmospheric is rather pretty.


  • jinsays gold member
    April 13, 2008
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    Bleak and desolate, yes. I felt that way too. As if that short walk to the light might take many stumbles and jolts. I could hear the crunches too, thank you for this wonderful imagery, and best wishes in this contest,
    Jin

    ***
    Please take this time to review your entry, one tiny typo, it will not hurt your chances in winning, if you can get it fixed before I judge, which will be in about six more hours. I will edit this comment before then..thanks again,
    Jin


  • Rianna Bear
    April 12, 2008

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    WHEN i looked at the pic too, i heard crunches of leaves also! nice take on the pic...sad and lonely, but good.

    *R

1 - 8 of 8